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Favourite saying or one liner’s.


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"i could sleep for a week on broken glass and eat half a chip shop"

 

"did someone set your face on fire and put it out with a hammer"

 

After being told you are putting on weight the reply.. " thats cause everytime i f*** your wife she makes me a sandwich"

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like trying to fertilise a field with a fart.

 

as nervous as a very short nun at the start of the penguin shooting season.

 

as welcome as a sausage roll at a bar mitzvah.

 

apologies in advance:scared1:

 

roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.

 

not saying she's fat but her graduation photo was taken from a helicopter.

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