Shane

Spot on! That should go in the philosophical one-liners.

Reminds me of the Family Guy episode where Quagmire goes on a road trip in his signwritten RV and Brian says 'Hey Quagmire, hasn't country got an O in it'

Eek, I shovelled chips (avg 3 mtrs a day) for 9 years till I got a tipper. Only ever felt crap after laurel shovelling. Worth being aware though - never heard of it before.

That actually brought a tear to my eye. Things like this define 'civilised'.

If someone begins with a request like that they are unlikely to be anything but aggro. Probably a well off tw@t who drives an audi.

I like it!

A reply like... Thanks for your query, I would like the tree very much. I assume you understand that the removal of such a tree is a job to be undertaken by professionals and as such would be charged at the appropriate rate. Or - As and when I require firewood I use the wood which people pay me to remove. I am not aware of any tree-removal charities in the area but wish you every success in finding one.

No idea if this is good value - but after reading another thread... **LOOK **ONLY 800 MILES FROM NEW LHD RB44 4X4 LEFT HAND DRIVE REYNOLDS BOUGHTON | eBay

Theres a tipper one of these on ebay!

Life is cruel, by the time you're old enough to have the know how, you just can't - not no how!

Ive been using wind breaks for ages - dirt cheap and roll out as much as you need. In the past Ive used pairs of ply sheets hinged together. Scaffold mesh sounds good

It may seem unfair but how? Ever thought how you would feel if your unroadworthy vehicle killed someone. Is it not better for people driving such vehicles to be stopped and heavily fined rather than cause a death? If you are running a properly maintained vehicle, carrying a load which is within the law then why worry? If they stop the cowboys and the alluminium dwellers then all the better. Life is full of hassles and costs - so what? Instead of comparing your hard life with that of a rock star or some hypothetical dreamland why not look as Syria, Bangladesh, Brazil or anywhere featured on the news. If life here is such a pain do something positive and either fight it legitimately (start campaigning etc.) or find an alternative elsewhere. In the mean time lets pray that nobody is injured by an unroadworthy vehicle which should have been stopped.

That's impressive - I'm in my 50s and still on prussiks

Good things come to those who wait, but much better things come to those who get off their ar5e and make it happen. I've never heard a judge say 'well, as you HOPED it would all run smoothly and, as you said in your plea, you were unlucky, we can forget the smashed bus, crushed house and mutilated body - CASE Dismisssed'

Tighter than a camel's ar5e in a sandstorm

Just found these two gems “In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” – Bill Cosby “Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don’t have a plan.” – Larry Winget

My guys were asking me for wisdom today (they must be desperate) 'What do you mean by wisdom?' I asked. They said they wanted some one liners (like you see on those crappy posters). I have seen millions over the years but couldn't think of any in that instant. Does anyone have any classics they are willing to share? Maybe some specific to arb work. Heres an old chestnut to get it started - A man proves he's a man when he stops trying to prove he's a man.

If you're going to have a hydraulic wheel-driving valve sticking make sure its the reverse one.

I thoought this thread was going to be about lay-by dwellers..

I calculated dry beech at about 1/3 ton per m3. When its in the back of the truck the compressed stuff at the bottom of the pile is probably more. Has anyone on here used a weighbridge ? Surely that would be a definitive answer- say 3.4 tons with 4 mtrs on, 2.1 after empying etc.....

Here's one I prepared earlier - just now in fact. I Love Trees The birds are sweet, I love their song But their tree cannot stay for long The tree is not in the right place It just has got too little space Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees Each day my car I have to clean The birds they aim, they are so mean Such effort oh it really grieves In winter as I scoop up leaves Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees And that one there, if I can Remove it and park my caravan And that one there makes my house dark My second car right there could park Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees It’s near my roof, yes that one there Just take it down, we need fresh air The guy next door, he’s such a swine Lets all his branches grow over mine Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees The drive’s too narrow, getting out is hell Lets have that one out as well The last tree really makes me worry It waves around in windy flurry Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees Don’t quote too much, Im not too wealthy And all this worry made me unhealthy They have to go and most sincere I’ve done my bit for the atmosphere Forgive me when its gone, oh please Don’t get me wrong – I love trees

Ode to an overweight tree surgeon. If you should ever see a fat bloke up a tree stop and say 'Hello' that fat bloke might be me.

This is a very thoughtful thread. If everyone could think like this then there would be no need for 'organised' religions. If everyone could accept the gifts they have (while they have them).... Likeitorlumpit - all the best for tomorrow - no doubt everyone who knows you, or knows of you, will be crossing everything tomorrow. Don't make any wise cracks to your surgeon about women drivers before the op. Best wishes Shane

If I don't care if anyone likes me does that mean I have a problem, or I just don't understand facebook??????????

A really fun time - lots of money raised for a good cause. It was good to put a few faces to the names. I didn't see Theocus but I saw your truck outside. A good show.