Shane

E7 C5 E1 They'll be on to us soon

When my daughter was about 14 and very 'teenage' I asked her to run some water (as I wanted a bath). After 10 minutes or so I heard water running outside. It was coming out of the upstairs waste pipe! Her reply to my rant was.. You only told me to run the water - You never said put the plug in.

Many can sympathise here, but do be careful what you publish on a forum.

Wasn't that the joke that Kryten told the Red Dwarf crew? C2 D6 D3 D3 D6 C3 D2 E1 (If my memory serves me correctly) It may not, of course.

Brilliant machines, I just wish they would change the name

Now that - is a classy reply.

Got a reply from him - he says he only wants the delivery cost up front - You can pay him for the chipper within 10 days of receiving it!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha Next time I sell anything I'll only expect the buyer to pay the postage, they can pay the price of the item some time after they receive it...... It must be genuine then, and he's a really trusting bloke, Why don't someone else ask him some questions - maybe have a prize for the best question/response.

There are 10 types of tree surgeon, Those who understand binary and those who don't.

I just sent him a message asking if its a rip-off? Why beat about the bush? My money's on it disappearing soon.

You can't knock him for selling it - just have to laugh at the idiots bidding on it. just because its on ebay you don't have to bid.

If at first you dont succeed - do it the way your husband told you to do it in the first place

Because that's not the right way. Chill out and stay (or become) professional - or at least talk professional.

Choppers and Chippers

How about Microsoftwood? or Laurel and Hardy

You're a luck man. Our local tip has NPR set up as you go in. All vans are stopped and theres a weight limit for the contents. Our best recycling plant (Arundel) charges under £4.00 mtr for chips so its not worth the hassle (and waiting) at the amenity tip. There is a closer commercial one but it's awful, I once saw the 360 driver drinking cider while working amongst us guys tipping out. I won't go there any more - and they charge twice as much.

I feel a new CH4 program coming here, Pimp ma arb trolley innit.

Its an IQ test - we have to work out the story from that picture. Is it something to do with the man with the 10 stone testicles?

Everyone has a useful and less useful side. I recall an incident where a group of travellers made some peoples lives better. In the 80s when I lived in Surrey there was a group of moped dudes who used to cause all sorts of trouble - basing themselves on a particular street corner. The police weren't interested, any attempt by joe public to get them to behave just met with verbal abuse.... so One of the locals knew a couple of mobile individuals and a few people clubbed together for a 'visit' to be arranged. Behold a couple of evenings later a transit pulled up next to the moped group and out jumped half a dozen 'unofficial law enforcers'. Within two minutes some of the mopeds had fallen over and sustained considerable damage, and some of the moped riders had to seek medical attention. BUT once they crawled away they never came back. I, for one, found the whole episode most disturbing and would never approve of violence but some of the locals thought it was a satisfactory resolution. Some concluded that everyone has their uses.

You know your self esteem is low when.. While making love to your other half you imagine that YOU are someone else. IIRC that was Bob Monkhouse.

Back in the autumn we had 14-15 weeks work lined up. The crap winter kept most people out of their gardens so the phone calls became few and far between. We never quite ran out of work but it got close (hence the fencing). That barren spell was due to a very long winter. I thought about diversifying during that period, we even did some new fences in my garden and I was really pleased with the result but.... How many things can you REALLY master. I recall several comments I received from the pictures I posted and realised that any new area is full of pitfalls, unknown knacks and so on. When I mentioned the possibilities to my customers some of them said they don't use people who offer lots of different services because they can't possibly be best at too many different things. That was a genuine view of many customers. The more you diversify the more tools you need too - can you REALLY justify all that expense? Round here the tree work has picked up massively lately. I'm doing an average of 3 quote visits a day (and getting most of them). I think theres plenty of tree work to be had at a price that enables me to keep all the kit up to date, pay my bills and have decent holidays. Maybe I'm just too old to want to learn new stuff - but I really don't see the need.

If you run a business and employ someone, teaching them the reality of the job - should you be surprised if they have a eureka moment and consider running their own company and (by default) becoming a competitor? If that's your view it would be safest not to employ anyone in case they develop into a rival. Did evevryone with this anxiety start up their own company styraight from college, or after redundancy in another industry - without learning a bit from others?? I suspect not - get realistic, it's always happened and it always will. Keep on good terms and maybe even share huge jobs in the future - This is, of course, just my humble opinion.

Thats it in a nutshell. If he doesnt use you every day then he wouldm't be surprised that you are thinking along these lines. I would suggest you mention it to him though, if he drove past when you were doing your own thing you wouldn't want him being 'too surprised'. If you are working effectively as a subbie he could just stop using you overnight which might put a lot more pressure on you to succeed on your own but if he is aware then it's all friendly and above board. One of my guys is doing this and we get on just fine, it's the way of the world. Best be careful what I say - he's a forum member:thumbup: Always be professional, no surprises, keep your contacts as friends.

While youre building up experience - a very rough guide is to imagine the branch/trunk is a cylinder FULL of water. So if it is 4ft long and 2ft diameter you have an oil barrel's worth of weight. As stated previously the small branches and stems are more difficult - If the leafy branch is 10 ft long and its 6 inch diameter at the butt end just assume a 10ft pipe 6 inches diameter full of water - if that doesn't equate to anything you can imagine then double the diameter and divide the length by 4. This roughly gives you two 20 ltr tubs stacked on top of each other (2ft 6 x 12 inches). This is not dead accurate but its a start till you get the hang of it. And don't worry about the quarter length/double diameter thing - just do it.

From my experience I think small jobs are much easier to price accurately. You can picture virtually every cut and even work out how many dragging trips will be required. Chances are it will only take up a tenth of the space in the van etc. The big ones where you find all sorts of tangles in the canopy, maybe an extra trip with the waste, the hours of ringing up the trunk etc. On a small job a 10% error maight translate into 5 minutes extra, on a big takedown it could be a day. I recon mostr of my big profit days have been where weve done a number of small jobs. PS the risk assessment is easier with Mrs Miggins bush (make sure Mr Miggins is at work all day).

I think the answer as to whether the money is good can be derived from the response. No further comment needed.