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Bolt

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Everything posted by Bolt

  1. Bolt

    Jokes???

    As a butcher is shooing away a Terrier from his shop, he sees a £10 note and a scrap of paper in it’s mouth, reading: “8 pork chops, please.” Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of pork chops in the dog’s mouth, and watches as the dog carefully accepts them and trots from the shop. Such was his surprise that the mutt hadn’t just eaten them on the spot, he leaves the shop in the care of his assistant, and follows the dog who is now waiting for a lights at the crossing. Having looked both ways, the terrier crosses the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench, waiting for the bus to rock up, and on the bus’s arrival, he walks around to the front, checks the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck. The bus with dog and butcher travels out into suburbia , the dog taking in the scenery as they go. After a while the terrier stands on the back of his seat then launches himself up to push the “stop” bell. The butcher follows him the dog off the bus. The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the step. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -WHAM!- against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around to the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big bloke in a string vest opens the door and in furious mood starts cursing, shouting and gesticulating at the dog. The butcher runs up and reprimands the house owner “What in hell are you doing?” He shouts “This dog’s a genius! What the hell is wrong with you? “Genius, my arse”, the owner responds, “It’s the second time this week he’s forgotten his keys.
  2. Bless. Glad to get you a bit more up to speed.
  3. Notch tradamus
  4. Plane trees and automobiles.
  5. Bolt

    Jokes???

    What religion do they practice in Hell? Crispianity.
  6. The secret life of petz l.
  7. HolmOak Alone
  8. Indespension day
  9. That’ll be the profit.
  10. The Igland of Dr. Moreau
  11. They have a lot to answer for.
  12. Franken stein
  13. Perfect.
  14. Honey brothers, I shrank the kids.
  15. Looks like one of those works calendars you used to get (or strive to avoid).
  16. Acer Ventura. Pet detective.
  17. Yellow hard hat, ok…. Probably pushing it with the blue dungarees.
  18. Despicable Tree
  19. Aint that the truth!
  20. Broke Track Mountain.
  21. A Boughton boy.
  22. Very bad Strimms
  23. Back Thuja Future
  24. The cinch who stole Christmas.

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