Bolt

Pirates of the karabiner.

Stepcut brothers

The ‘Saw’ franchise.

The amazing spiderjack.

…or a really onerous risk assessment.

A Spanish magician says he will disappear on the count of 3. He says "uno, dos..." poof. He disappeared without a tres.

I don’t know about cutting through your ropes (as others have hinted - that’s not exactly something that you may want to disclose due to professional pride) but IME the consequence of the recent ‘revision’ to climbing practice is probably going to affect anchor selection. I have had precious few anchor points fail on one system…. and only one that failed completely (climbing on a squirrel damaged beech whilst scrabbling on LV line clearance). I started using two anchors systematically on SSE work back in 2015. SSE managers were very fierce about it. What I found was that if you have to have two anchors, after a while, one is your main anchor and carefully selected, whilst the other is a bit more pushing-the-envelope-ish…. and as such, is far more likely to fail or rip out (the mindset is that it doesn’t really matter if it does as you are still protected by your main). The result of this is that it conditions the climber to ‘normalise’ the use of crappy anchors. The conclusion over time is that as you are used to it, both anchors may be pretty crap.

I was hoping to reinvent myself as a influencer. Let me know if you want me to PM you my deets for the Merch.

Can you do me a Lantra assessment?

That Slovakian engineering is indeed something for all us Brits to be rightly proud of.

The Lantra assessment should also be ‘independent’ of the training and is a certificate of competence, not a certificate of training.

Ref: Insurance. Maybe they’ll pay out, maybe they won’t- they seem to be a law unto themselves. The legal requirement is that staff are properly trained to undertake the work expected of them. If push came to shove, holding a Lantra or City and Guilds qualification does not prove adequate training. An example: There is no requirement to use a top handled saw to undertake the ‘Aerial cutting with chainsaw using free fall techniques’ assessment (CS39 in old money). I can pass that qual quite easily using a rear handled saw, having never even laid a finger on a topper. When I bury the thing in my left wrist, how do I ever demonstrate adequate training?

Ref: refreshers. It is generally accepted that refresher training is just that, training. There is no legal requirement to undertake a refresher assessment with the likes of Lantra or City and Guilds. Most organisations accept ‘in-house’ refresher training tickets awarded by a recognised training centre.

I have put people through the City and Guilds Felling qualification who previously held a Lantra Maint and XCut qual. with no problems. Many people still seem to get really confused between Lantra training courses and Lantra qualifications.

Possibly more British than the latest gen Defenders though!

Two nuns are driving back to the convent late at night when a vampire jumps onto the bonnet. The nun who is driving says to the other "Quick! Show him your cross." The other nun winds down the window, leans herself right out and yells "Get the ******** off our ******** car, you ******** bastard!”

I don’t know Kevin, i’m really not tooooo sure…… But, If I had to try to list threads that seem to aim to derail an entire f*cking arb forum….. (like if I searched really, really hard)…. It probably wouldn’t include this one. Just sayin’

Just the two.

An old fella clatters his supermarket trolley into another as he reaches the end of an isle. Looking up, he sees he has stumbled into the path at a well honed guy in his 20s. “Why, I’m so terribly sorry”, stammered the old boy, “but it’s my wife…. I’ve looked and looked, but I can’t find her anywhere.” “Don’t sweat it”, laughed the young buck, “Turns out I’ve lost mine as well. Beats me how they manage to disappear so much, it’s getting beyond a joke”. “What would you say to us helping each other out”, suggests the old fella hopefully “What does your wife look like?" "Well, she is 24 yrs old, and tall” answers the young guy, “with blonde hair, big blue eyes, long legs, big boobs… and she's wearing tight white shorts, a halter top and no bra….What does your wife look like?" "Doesn't matter” says the old timer “let's look for yours."

What, like nasty? Naaah, she was a charming old soul. I don’t reckon she ever bore an ounce of malus.

Solid nose doesn’t bother me. I’m happy if you’re happy.

…..alas, Solid nose. Sorry.

STIHL 18" Light 04 Bar For .325" RM3 / RS Pro 1.3mm 74 Links Chain WWW.GAYWAYSLTD.CO.UK STIHL 18" Light 04 Bar For .325" RM3 / RS Pro 1.3mm 74 Links Chain This type of thing?

Thick shirt, suspenders and bra… …sounds like a woman I used to meet up with at Pembroke Dock.

Not a bad plan. You’ll still qualify for the shirt.