Most awful biccies ever????

[Shane]

Just had to share this unvelievable experience!!!

 

Some years ago we were given some biccies with our tea (all very nice).

Then as we nibbled the biscuits all three of us had a reflex spitting out/coughing reaction. Luckily the 'kind' customer had gone round the corner by the time we did this. We concluded that the dry digestives must have been left over war rations and had a good laugh. The taste was honestly indescribable.

 

From that day on we always joked about the most awful biccies in the world - ironically provided by a Mrs Dyer (the name can be published as she is now long passed on).

 

Now the really bad news... - just when yu thought it was safe to return to the biccy tin....

 

Mid morning snack II - Return of the killer biscuits

 

Last Friday one of our customers gave us something that was pure evil, neee straight from Satan's bowels I tell ye.

 

We were offered a plate of shortbread chunks.

Ant refused as he thought they smelt a bit funny, but us fat boys went for it.

 

'kin eck!' I can only describe the after-shock of a tiny amount as something like some dog doo dipped in paint stripper. I have no idea what had been done to them but half an hour later I still couldn't bear to put my hand anywhere near my nose - just horrific. I'm still not sure if she was trying to poison us to avoid paying.

 

Has anyone out there had a similar tale of culinary woe?

We all need counselling now for our paranoia - not to mention the number of ablution visits we have since had to endure.

[Millbert]

Beware the old crusty biscuits! Was once offered some home made ones by a lady. You needed a chisel to break them and two litres of tea to swallow them!

[Breezeblock]

blue ribands are the worst polystyrene with photocopied chocolate yuk

[Haironyourchest]

Ever see the youtube vids where guys taste army rations from the vietnam, and even WWII era? Pretty gross stuff. Peanut butter holds up pretty well, apparently.

[djbobbins]

Dunno about biccies but my Dad was the village postie when I was a kid and got fed a lot of cups of tea and snacks. One of the old dears on his round made pastry with loads of salt in it (far more than the pinch required for a bit of flavour); despite it being 1990 and nearly everyone having fridges, gone-off milk was not uncommon and I clearly remember his displeasure at being given a cup of tea that had been 'milked' with UHT strawberry milkshake. Mmmmmm!

[Luckyeleven]

I am told the worst biscuits come out of male group gatherings at places like Eton.

[Ty Korrigan]

End of a day last week I got offered a beer by

Naughty I know but I had at least 2 hours before I was due home so the wife wouldn't smell it on me.

With dusk falling I didn't see the label as the client handed me the bottle.

Necking it with maximum enthusiasm, I choked and spluttered on a vile sickly liquid.

Trying to focus on the label, in French I read 'Bien Vu' biere sans alcohol...

Translates as Supermarket Value alcohol free beer...

Blerk!

Ty

[Stubby]

End of a day last week I got offered a beer by

Naughty I know but I had at least 2 hours before I was due home so the wife wouldn't smell it on me.

With dusk falling I didn't see the label as the client handed me the bottle.

Necking it with maximum enthusiasm, I choked and spluttered on a vile sickly liquid.

Trying to focus on the label, in French I read 'Bien Vu' biere sans alcohol...

Translates as Supermarket Value alcohol free beer...

Blerk!

Ty

 

That's a crime !

[stihlmadasever]

I am told the worst biscuits come out of male group gatherings at places like Eton.

 

The soggy ones...???

Oooft thats nasty:biggrin:

[aspenarb]

Why has the " custard cream" not had a mention ?

 

 

 

Bob