Jokes???

[Christopher Schroeter]

Me and my mates have started a band. We're called 1023MB cos we haven't got a Gig yet.

[Mark Bolam]

2 hours ago, Al Cormack said:

Some idiot found my debit card inside Starbucks literally 30 seconds after I dropped it!!! He tried keeping it, even though I caught him picking it up.
I kept tapping him on the shoulder to tell him to give it back, but he denied having it
This is where it gets interesting ...

An even bigger idiot kept tapping on .... See More

Got me Al!

[muttley9050]

[emoji35][emoji35][emoji35][emoji35][emoji35] Some idiot found my debit card inside Starbucks literally 30 seconds after I dropped it!!! He tried keeping it, even though I caught him picking it up.
I kept tapping him on the shoulder to tell him to give it back, but he denied having it [emoji35][emoji35][emoji35][emoji35][emoji35][emoji35]
This is where it gets interesting [emoji849]...

An even bigger idiot kept tapping on .... See More

Good one.

[Gary Prentice]

9 hours ago, Al Cormack said:

Some idiot found my debit card inside Starbucks literally 30 seconds after I dropped it!!! He tried keeping it, even though I caught him picking it up.
I kept tapping him on the shoulder to tell him to give it back, but he denied having it
This is where it gets interesting ...

An even bigger idiot kept tapping on .... See More

 

7 hours ago, Mark Bolam said:

Got me Al!

 

42 minutes ago, muttley9050 said:

9 hours ago, Al Cormack said:

 

Good one.

I don't get it 

[Stubby]

Just now, Gary Prentice said:

 

 

I don't get it 

How many times did you click " see more " ?

[Gary Prentice]

once?

 

Now I get it!

Edited January 30, 2018 by Gary Prentice

[Stubby]

9 minutes ago, Gary Prentice said:

once?

 

Now I get it!

Its OK Garry . You have a little lie down matey

[bluebedouin]

DAVID BLAINE TEST
This is creepy!
.
.
.
.
.
Think of a letter between
A and W
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Repeat it
out loud as
you scroll down
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Keep going
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Don't stop
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Think of an
animal
that begins
with that letter
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Repeat it
out loud
as you
scroll down
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Think of either
a man's or a woman's
name
that
begins
with the
last letter
in the
animal's name
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
Almost
there
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Now
count out
the letters
in that name
on the fingers
of the hand
you are not
using to
scroll down
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Take the
hand you
counted with
and hold it out
in front of you
at face level
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Look at your
palm
very closely
and
notice
the
lines
on
your
hand
.
.
.
.
.
Do the lines
take the
form of the
first letter
in the
persons name?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Of course they
F****ing
don't !
.
.
.
..
.
Now smack
yourself in the head,
get a life,
and
stop playing
stupid
forum games!
.
.
.

[Treerover]

Memory going a bit, Tree rover? [emoji3]

I’m not sure quite what happened there !!!! ??‍♂️
It’s since I took the curtains down, there’s been a bit of an echo cho cho

[Sutton]

One for the ex-service:

An Officer In A Hot Air Balloon

 

An officer in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted an NCO below.

He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The NCO below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an NCO ," said the officer.

"I am," replied the NCO, "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the officer, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information and the fact is that I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."

The NCO below responded, "You must be an officer."

"I am," replied the officer, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the NCO, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow it's my fault."