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bluebedouin

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  • Content Count

    278
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About bluebedouin

  • Rank
    Senior Member

Personal Information

  • Location:
    Northampton UK
  • Interests
    leatherwork,climbing trees,cycling,foraging
  • Occupation
    Carer

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  1. Making off without payment The offence of making off without payment, commonly known as 'bilking' is an offence under Section 3 of the Theft Act 1978.Warwickshire Police
  2. With most birthdays you always get the inevitable question: "What do you want?" Nine times out of ten they don't listen.Isn't it great when they do!
  3. They don't actually.Unless a particular bye law is in place to the contrary,speed restrictions don't apply to cyclists.
  4. A mother in law said to her son's wife after the baby was born,"I don't mean to be rude, but he doesn't look anything like my son." The daughter in law lifted her skirt and said, "I don't mean to be rude either, but this is a fanny, not a fecking photocopier."
  5. Just seen on the news that Scotland has introduced the minimum charge for alcohol "to significantly cut the number of alcohol related deaths". So shoplifting will increase,muggings & burglaries to get the money will increase.People will be driving over the border to England on booze cruises. At the moment the extra money goes to the retailer,how long will it be before it goes to the government?
  6. I can highly recommend a Bedford CF1 bedouin conversion.Had ours for about 13 years,sadly gone now.
  7. 1.I'd get him to define that & the reasoning behind it. 2.It may not be the size.As strange as it may seem,it may be because it's not the same colour as everyone else's! As you're right next door to a builders yard,I'd love to hear their logic of not in keeping with surroundings!
  8. Wouldn't take him long to find out. An***** Mo***** Hythe,Southampton 07557 ****** 02380 ******
  9. Or if he's english...http://translate.google.com/translate?u=https%3A//kovkapro.com/tokarno-frezernoe-delo/test-tokarnyh-mini-stankov-po-derevu/&hl=en&langpair=auto|en&tbb=1&ie=UTF-8
  10. I miss the old phones that had a circular dial!
  11. If you mean Tess of the Durbevilles,I have it as a talking book on cassette.So,if you have a Sony Walkman you could listen to it whilst sat on the bog!Pm me your address & I'll stick it in the post.
  12. On the subject of optical illusions are you referring to the knob in her glass?
  13. A chap asks a prostitute for a shag and she tells him it’s £30. "Fine" he says, "but I’m a bit kinky". She agrees that this is OK as long as he doesn’t do anything violent. They get back to her flat and he gets out four big springs attached to some straps. "I want you to put one of these on each elbow and one on each knee" he asks. The prostitute is worried that she’s getting into something a bit heavy, but she goes along with his request. Then she is told to get down on all fours, naked, in front of him which she does grudgingly. Then he asks her to start bouncing up and down on the springs and finally he takes duck call whistle from his pocket. "Blow on this while I’m shagging you" he tells her. So he’s banging away at her from behind while she’s bouncing on the springs blowing the duck whistle. Suddenly she starts to enjoy the shagging, so much so in fact that she experiences the most fantastic orgasm she’s ever had. After they’ve finished she says "Wow, that was the most fantastic sex I’ve had in 25 years on the game, how the hell did you make it so good?" "Ah," he replies, "Four spring Duck Technique"
  14. Theresa May is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. She enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness and greets one. The patient replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o the puddin race, Aboon them a ye take yer place, Painch, tripe or thairm, As langs my airm." May is confused, so she just grins and moves on to the next patient. The patient responds: "Some hae meat an canna eat, And some wad eat that want it, But we hae meat an we can eat, So let the Lord be thankit." Even more confused, and her grin now rictus-like, the PM moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant: "Wee sleekit, cowerin, timrous beasty, O the panic in thy breasty, Thou needna start awa sae hastie, Wi bickering brattle." Now seriously troubled, TM turns to the accompanying doctor and asks "Is this a psychiatric ward?" "No," replies the doctor, "this is the serious Burns unit."

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