Jokes???

[Jonesie]

excellent where can you buy them?

[PeteB]

Cracking! Put me down for a couple as well!

[firewoodman]

oh how funny would that be driving down the M4 in wales now that the police dont patrol it

[bob]

Hover Missile England Design - Inflatable Missile on eBay, also, Other Outdoor Toys Activities, Outdoor Toys Activities, Toys Games (end time 30-May-09 10:53:46 BST)

[MasterBlaster]

When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was attracted to him. And during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex?

"Tarzan not know sex" he replied.

So Jane explained to him what sex was.

Tarzan said, "Oh! Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified Jane said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong! But I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and lay down on the ground. "Here' she said." while pointing to her privates ... "You must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, then stepped closer to her and kicked her in the crotch!

Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity! Eventually she managed to grasp for air and screamed, "What the hell did you do that for?!!"

Tarzan replied, "Check for squirrel!"

[Stephen Blair]

lol, that was brilliant:001_tt1:

[geoff]

When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was attracted to him. And during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex?

"Tarzan not know sex" he replied.

So Jane explained to him what sex was.

Tarzan said, "Oh! Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified Jane said, "Tarzan you have it all wrong! But I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and lay down on the ground. "Here' she said." while pointing to her privates ... "You must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, then stepped closer to her and kicked her in the crotch!

Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity! Eventually she managed to grasp for air and screamed, "What the hell did you do that for?!!"

Tarzan replied, "Check for squirrel!"

 

Do you have 'sciurus vulgaris' over there ,or ar they all grey ones ?

[tommer9]

A woman was in a coma. One day the nurses noticed a slight response whilst washing her 'down there'. Thay told her husband about it, and suggested that he try a little fellatio to see if it may bring her round. A few minutes later her monitor fletlined- no pulse at all. The nurses rushed in-"what happened?" The husband replied" well i did what you said, I think she choked!"

[penfold]

[Mick Stockbridge]

How I learnt to mind my own business:

 

I was walking past the mental hospital the other day and all the patients were shouting "13....13....13"

 

The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on....

 

Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then they all started shouting "14....14....14"