Advice on getting care for the old or otherwise ill or disabled..

[john87]

3 minutes ago, Doug Tait said:

Yes I'm sure a lot of people will find some advice/support very helpful.

I was fortunate that I was able to look after both parents at home myself at the end, with the GP visiting for pain relief. Always been grateful it was for a relatively short time, and I didn't have to contend with bureaucracy or care costs.

Problem is, the law surrounding all this is so complicated and social services take full advantage of this to lie to people to avoid providing services and thereby spending money.

 

I say to them, "so you have no money, TOUGH SHIT" the law is still the law, it is the will of parliament, if you do not like the law, then i suggest you go into politics and change it.

 

If i was stopped by the police with no tax on my car, do you think it would be ok if i were to say; "Officer, i have not got any tax, but it is lack of resources you see"

 

Do you think they would say; "well, in that case sir you may ignore the law"

 

They normally go a bit quiet after that..

 

john..

[Peasgood]

The thread title and the first few posts need tidying up to reflect the help offered with navigating the care system.

If/when you enter that world of pain you will be grateful for any scrap of assistance you can get!

Having been through it of late I can say it is the awful topping on a nightmare experience. I am left with a very dim view of the NHS, most especially GPs and their absence/reluctance to see any patients. The hospital system is mostly dysfunctional despite the efforts of some of the people in there. There are some wonderful people seemingly trying to do their absolute best but there are also a high number that are the complete opposite and a big number that although presumably trained in biology would not know their arse from their elbow.

I hear rumours that McMillan offer a great deal of support, as far as my experience goes it is along the same lines as mermaids are beautiful and unicorns are magical. Haven't seen any of them so wouldn't know. Haven't tried to contact mermaids or unicorns so maybe I am being unjust putting them in the same bracket.

Spoke to the GP about palliative care to be told they don't offer any as they can't get the staff. One of the district nurses did offer to arrange physio when Mum was no longer able to get out of bed, of all the shit we have had to deal with over the last 6 months or so that was the one that really broke me. I don't know how it can be so cruel as being told Mum has a fortnight at best and the next day being offered physio.

I am a strong believer of not relying on the state for much at all and that you have to look after your family but a bit more help would have been appreciated. Me and my brother have had to deal with things that went way beyond decency and dignity.  It has been very hard work and I genuinely think it very nearly killed me and my brother in the process.

Anyway, Mum had 24 hour care from her family, we made sure she was able to stay at home where she wanted to be and passed away this morning.

 

I'm sure you good people will pass on your messages to me and I don't want to seem ungrateful by saying I struggle with the emotional bit that such things bring on. Instead you should prepare yourselves for when you have to deal with it, either for yourself or for your loved ones. For something as basic as this you would think the process was simple, it isn't.

[john87]

58 minutes ago, Peasgood said:

The thread title and the first few posts need tidying up to reflect the help offered with navigating the care system.

If/when you enter that world of pain you will be grateful for any scrap of assistance you can get!

Having been through it of late I can say it is the awful topping on a nightmare experience. I am left with a very dim view of the NHS, most especially GPs and their absence/reluctance to see any patients. The hospital system is mostly dysfunctional despite the efforts of some of the people in there. There are some wonderful people seemingly trying to do their absolute best but there are also a high number that are the complete opposite and a big number that although presumably trained in biology would not know their arse from their elbow.

I hear rumours that McMillan offer a great deal of support, as far as my experience goes it is along the same lines as mermaids are beautiful and unicorns are magical. Haven't seen any of them so wouldn't know. Haven't tried to contact mermaids or unicorns so maybe I am being unjust putting them in the same bracket.

Spoke to the GP about palliative care to be told they don't offer any as they can't get the staff. One of the district nurses did offer to arrange physio when Mum was no longer able to get out of bed, of all the shit we have had to deal with over the last 6 months or so that was the one that really broke me. I don't know how it can be so cruel as being told Mum has a fortnight at best and the next day being offered physio.

I am a strong believer of not relying on the state for much at all and that you have to look after your family but a bit more help would have been appreciated. Me and my brother have had to deal with things that went way beyond decency and dignity.  It has been very hard work and I genuinely think it very nearly killed me and my brother in the process.

Anyway, Mum had 24 hour care from her family, we made sure she was able to stay at home where she wanted to be and passed away this morning.

 

I'm sure you good people will pass on your messages to me and I don't want to seem ungrateful by saying I struggle with the emotional bit that such things bring on. Instead you should prepare yourselves for when you have to deal with it, either for yourself or for your loved ones. For something as basic as this you would think the process was simple, it isn't.

You did good, your mum would be proud of you..

 

People do not realise that they have all this to come. They listen to what politicians have to say, unaware that it is all lies, they think that everyone that needs help is a "scrounger" The government encourage this view, divide and conquer sort of thing..

 

People that have actually been through the system know that to get any help at all is next to impossible unless you are VERY well versed in care law AND have very powerful medical evidence.. A "scrounger" has no chance.. Never forget there are quite a few "hidden" disabilities too..

 

The government, when covid came along, were DESPERATE, to make sure the truth about the welfare state never got out. They were DETERMINED, that when people got made redundant etc, that they would be treated nearly as royalty, so as further down the line, they would say that "we were on universal credit once, it was ok, it is just all the scroungers are whingers"

 

Well, let me tell you the truth.. all their claims were simply waved through for political expediency. Normally a claimant would wait MONTHS, and you do realise that it is not backdated?? This means that many end up losing everything and homeless..

 

To give you an idea about how things were waved through. I am very closely associated with 2 people that work for the DWP. There were claims from people that stated their kids names were 1, 2, 3, and Fish, Chips, and Peas. Their claims were simply waved through..

 

This country is very sick indeed. The NHS HAS been broken up for sale. Every microscopic department is run as a separate business ready to be sold off. Say a ward manager wants a shelf putting up, they have to get a "cost code" [like a purchase order in effect] and their ward is then billed. Ok, so now they have their new shelf, they want the old desk taking away. Guess what, they have to contact the facilities department and they then get billed for the transport.. It is INSANE, the admin costs and delays are just mental.. It is the same with everything. You want a domestic to come and clean a bedroom?? Your ward will be billed for it even though every last person involved and every bit of property is part of the same hospital owned by the same trust.. It is lunacy..

 

As Peasgood has said, doctors will not see you. So what do you do?? Easy, you complain to the NHS!! Guess what will happen?? You will be given the run around on purpose to wear you down, and finally, after they have finished laughing themselves silly, they will spring it on you.. FACT, very very few doctors or their surgeries are anything to do with the NHS.

 

They are all [well nearly all] privately owned businesses who take the attitude TOUGH SHIT and if you do not like it you will be simply and instantly [no matter what the "rules" state] dumped.. They merely have a CONTRACT with the NHS..

 

So, we are now more or less back to the 1940's when all doctors were private. Now, remember how i said in another post how that the law had been changed so that the NHS COULD charge??

 

Will not be long now and all doctors surgeries will be charging.. Just wait and see..

 

But still, people cannot see what is happening, they cannot see how the ordinary working man is being duped. People have delusions of grandeur, and think that they have their own home and business and are somehow "middle class" and a cut above. Yes, until the second a member or their family needs help or care. They all assumed that the NHS would help only to find that effectively, unless you are run over by a car or fall out of a tree and need acute surgical intervention, that there is not much the NHS will do. You will be left high and dry, and, if you do not have hundreds or thousands of pounds sitting ready, you will not be getting any care and you will lose everything if you do..

 

The attitude is; "we are the NHS, we deal with illnesses. You have not got an illness, you have got a condition, nothing to do with us, suggest you learn to live with it" so, if you have or develop any sort of "chronic" condition as you age, say dementia or whatever, you are more or less on your own..

 

I could write reams of stuff about this, even where people have been, basically, not far off murdered by the NHS, but nothing happens, [and i would get in serious shit]

 

This is supposed to be a civilised country.. Not anymore.. We have gone back nearly 100 years to "them and us"

 

john...

Edited February 20, 2022 by john87

[Peasgood]

There are widespread comments about how difficult it is to see a GP.  To illustrate just how bad it is you should go on the BUPA website and see if you can book a face to face visit to a private GP. These are offered by BUPA at £70 for 15 minutes, only one I can find available is 180 miles away at 7am a week on Tuesday. 
People say why don’t you go private for treatment then. Try it, they are fully booked and it is not an option 

[Chipperclown]

Just checking have RUSSIA invaded?

Edited February 20, 2022 by Chipperclown

[spudulike]

4 hours ago, Peasgood said:

The thread title and the first few posts need tidying up to reflect the help offered with navigating the care system.

If/when you enter that world of pain you will be grateful for any scrap of assistance you can get!

Having been through it of late I can say it is the awful topping on a nightmare experience. I am left with a very dim view of the NHS, most especially GPs and their absence/reluctance to see any patients. The hospital system is mostly dysfunctional despite the efforts of some of the people in there. There are some wonderful people seemingly trying to do their absolute best but there are also a high number that are the complete opposite and a big number that although presumably trained in biology would not know their arse from their elbow.

I hear rumours that McMillan offer a great deal of support, as far as my experience goes it is along the same lines as mermaids are beautiful and unicorns are magical. Haven't seen any of them so wouldn't know. Haven't tried to contact mermaids or unicorns so maybe I am being unjust putting them in the same bracket.

Spoke to the GP about palliative care to be told they don't offer any as they can't get the staff. One of the district nurses did offer to arrange physio when Mum was no longer able to get out of bed, of all the shit we have had to deal with over the last 6 months or so that was the one that really broke me. I don't know how it can be so cruel as being told Mum has a fortnight at best and the next day being offered physio.

I am a strong believer of not relying on the state for much at all and that you have to look after your family but a bit more help would have been appreciated. Me and my brother have had to deal with things that went way beyond decency and dignity.  It has been very hard work and I genuinely think it very nearly killed me and my brother in the process.

Anyway, Mum had 24 hour care from her family, we made sure she was able to stay at home where she wanted to be and passed away this morning.

 

I'm sure you good people will pass on your messages to me and I don't want to seem ungrateful by saying I struggle with the emotional bit that such things bring on. Instead you should prepare yourselves for when you have to deal with it, either for yourself or for your loved ones. For something as basic as this you would think the process was simple, it isn't.

Sounds like you have been through a hellish time but you did right by your mother and when you get over her passing away, you will look back and reflect on the fact you did all you can and you will gain strength from that fact. 

In time you will remember the good stuff and laugh again.

 

 

[john87]

4 hours ago, Peasgood said:

The thread title and the first few posts need tidying up to reflect the help offered with navigating the care system.

If/when you enter that world of pain you will be grateful for any scrap of assistance you can get!

I just renamed the thread..

 

john..

[aspenarb]

7 hours ago, john87 said:

Hi all,

 

Not promising i can help, but i will try to point anyone that is a bit stuck in the right direction if i can..

 

john..

 

I think the right direction for getting help for old folk these days would be to put them in a dingy and beach them somewhere along the Kent coast, they will be in five star luxury within the hour.

 

Bob

[Peasgood]

One thing I would say we got in great quantities was equipment.

If you need a zimmer frame, commode, bath aid (electric seat to lower into bath), hospital bed etc they are there straight away, often two of them and often without asking/wanting them.

The cynic in me says they are bringing £5 zimmer frames and charging the Gov £50. I shouldn't be ungrateful because they did help a great deal but I was quite surprised at how readily available these things were. The service there was Amazon Prime type service.

[Mark Bolam]

Peasgood that was a tough read mate.

You and your brother should hold your heads up high.

Your Mam would be very proud of you both, and I hope she’s at peace now.

 

Look after yourselves mate.

 

John, this is a very difficult, informative and thought-provoking thread.

Thanks for taking the time.