Mental health and wellbeing

[Ian Flatters]

As the world becomes ever more aware about mental health and employee wellbeing is it becoming more standard to have these in place?

 

Our story...

 

We've had this in place for around 4 years now after one of our youngest lads father sadly took his own life and until covid it was barely used by any of the lads.

 

My thoughts about it have also changed, before I saw it as another expense sadly and wrongly so. With having access to 24hr 7 days a week it not only covers employed staff but their spouse and children. It covers most things including alcohol, drugs, loss of a loved one, loneliness, anxiety, stress, sleep and a whole lot more. I'm now fully behind it and believe that it's a great cost to spend.

 

But I guess my question is more of because men do find it hard to talk and most of us have had bad days, weeks, months. Do you think this would help you as a business owner or an employee?

 

I mean it's helped me as well, my early to mid twenties I was, well a arrogant dickhead to be fair and honest, losing some arb friends who just walked away but then it wasn't something you talked about so much back then and I don't blame them or hold and grudges. I'm sure there's a few posts on here that would back that up my knobbishness from years gone by. Sadly I didn't have access to this stuff and had a long road to recovery over the years but I was lucky that I have wonderful support from my wife and real friends that helped me hopefully become a better person with me feeling better in myself over the last few years from using it. But whilst sitting in the truck waiting for the rain to pass I was wondering if I'd had access to it back then how much better I could have been sooner.

 

I fully accept some might read this and think it's a load of tosh but wondered if it may lead to some positive conversation with tips of how others got better. So I'll start off with a couple of things that have seriously helped me.

 

* understanding that somethings are out of your control.

 

* breathing techniques and yoga (yoga with kassandra helps me most mornings on YouTube [emoji6]).

 

* openly talking to friends and family about your struggles and stresses.

 

I have loads more but its stopped raining so I'm about to jump out of the truck and crack on surveying but please post your advice or even maybe take that step and voices your worries, you never know a member on here may have been through what your currently starting to experience.

 

Apologies for the waffled post I'm writing it on my phone and the gramme police haven't turned up to correct me yet. [emoji30]

[Doug Tait]

Credit to you for taking steps to help people, mental health issues will affect the majority at some point in life and I'd think it will only benefit someone to know their employer is accepting and prepared to help. The more open and supportive the people around you are when you're struggling the better.

 

I spent a number of years in a bad place mentally after losing someone close to me suddenly after a road accident. All that was on offer to help was pharmaceuticals, suggestions of improving diet and excercise, and a 'get over it' attitude from many.

 

I didn't try yoga with kassandra (it was before YouTube!), but agree with accepting that you can't change some things, and also accepting that life is still happening whether you want it or not.

 

I also found I would severely lose my temper at bad driving, proper red mist descended and it scared me what could happen as I knew I was out of control. Even stopped driving to avoid it, but eventually I learnt to control those emotions by reciting Churchill speeches when I felt the mist coming down. Sounds daft but it worked and still does if I'm getting wound up.

[Tommy_B]

Spot on mate. Good post. I find we all do things to extremes in this job. Any chance to talk this over has to be good imo

[skyhuck]

1 hour ago, Ian Flatters said:

 

As the world becomes ever more aware about mental health and employee wellbeing is it becoming more standard to have these in place?

 

Our story...

 

We've had this in place for around 4 years now after one of our youngest lads father sadly took his own life and until covid it was barely used by any of the lads.

 

My thoughts about it have also changed, before I saw it as another expense sadly and wrongly so. With having access to 24hr 7 days a week it not only covers employed staff but their spouse and children. It covers most things including alcohol, drugs, loss of a loved one, loneliness, anxiety, stress, sleep and a whole lot more. I'm now fully behind it and believe that it's a great cost to spend.

 

But I guess my question is more of because men do find it hard to talk and most of us have had bad days, weeks, months. Do you think this would help you as a business owner or an employee?

 

I mean it's helped me as well, my early to mid twenties I was, well a arrogant dickhead to be fair and honest, losing some arb friends who just walked away but then it wasn't something you talked about so much back then and I don't blame them or hold and grudges. I'm sure there's a few posts on here that would back that up my knobbishness from years gone by. Sadly I didn't have access to this stuff and had a long road to recovery over the years but I was lucky that I have wonderful support from my wife and real friends that helped me hopefully become a better person with me feeling better in myself over the last few years from using it. But whilst sitting in the truck waiting for the rain to pass I was wondering if I'd had access to it back then how much better I could have been sooner.

 

I fully accept some might read this and think it's a load of tosh but wondered if it may lead to some positive conversation with tips of how others got better. So I'll start off with a couple of things that have seriously helped me.

 

* understanding that somethings are out of your control.

 

* breathing techniques and yoga (yoga with kassandra helps me most mornings on YouTube ).

 

* openly talking to friends and family about your struggles and stresses.

 

I have loads more but its stopped raining so I'm about to jump out of the truck and crack on surveying but please post your advice or even maybe take that step and voices your worries, you never know a member on here may have been through what your currently starting to experience.

 

Apologies for the waffled post I'm writing it on my phone and the gramme police haven't turned up to correct me yet.

 

Sorry if I'm being thick, but what is it you "have in place"?

[David Cropper]

I had a case of this today. My french pal a gardener/forester, 36 years old, was at my place and I'd got him some work with a Brit neighbour. He then starts to get upset as he's worried he can't cope with extra work. It turns out he was working at the local chateau at the edge of the village this morning,  rained very heavily in the night meaning he was struggling to get the grass down. He told the owner he would return later after lunch when it was drier. Owner started moaning etc, turns out he constantly micro manages ever job that Franck does. Whilst he's telling me the tale,  he starts to cry. The stress of it all has gotten to him in a big way. I took him into my kitchen, sat him down and we went through his options. The end result was that I've told him that when he's finished and the owner has paid him, thank him for the previous work but unfortunately it is impossible to continue due to his behaviour. Be polite but firm, his mental health is worth more than a few euros. I was worried he would take the stress home, a wife and two little ones to consider. He was thinking of future work from this chap,  not worth it in the long run, something else will turn up. Quite worrying at the time as he's a nice lad but prone to thinking the worst will happen. I'll ring him in awhile to see what happened.

[Ian Flatters]

Sorry if I'm being thick, but what is it you "have in place"?

In fairness I was writing it in the truck. We signed up to a service through the HR and legal company we use. It basically gives all employees and thier family 24hr access to councling and wellbeing apps. All calls are normally answered within 4 rings and any call back is within the hour, no matter what time of day or day of the week. Someone you've never met may be just the person you need to chat to at that time.

[Joe Newton]

How much is it Ian?

 

I think it's a great idea. We've all been affected by mental health somewhere or other, whether it's personally or someone you might know. 

[Mick Dempsey]

Personally I think if you’ve really gone mental, you know throwing your own shit at people in the shopping mall, fair enough.

 

If you’re just having a bad day and things are getting on top of you, can’t cope etc. Then have a drink, phone a mate, pull yourself together, life is bloody awful sometimes, get used to it.

 

 

[the village idiot]

3 minutes ago, Mick Dempsey said:

Personally I think if you’ve really gone mental, you know throwing your own shit at people in the shopping mall, fair enough.

 

If you’re just having a bad day and things are getting on top of you, can’t cope etc. Then have a drink, phone a mate, pull yourself together, life is bloody awful sometimes, get used to it.

 

 

I don't think Ian is really talking about either of those scenarios.

[skyhuck]

17 minutes ago, Mick Dempsey said:

Personally I think if you’ve really gone mental, you know throwing your own shit at people in the shopping mall, fair enough.

 

If you’re just having a bad day and things are getting on top of you, can’t cope etc. Then have a drink, phone a mate, pull yourself together, life is bloody awful sometimes, get used to it.

 

 

I tend to think the same myself.

 

Maybe I've just been very lucky not to suffer with poor mental health, but we are all pretty blessed in the west, I just think about how some poor people live around the world and just count my blessings.