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Well done Stevie for bringing the subject up. Stress, depression and anxiety are subjects we rough, tough Arb types don’t talk about easily (especially me). I don’t have the stress of running a business, just the stress, remorse and depression associated with throwing everything I once cherished away. I’m made-up for you for beating it brother, as for myself - I still have a long way to go (cant even see the light at the end of the tunnel yet, let alone the blue-sky, clarity and sunshine I long for).

 

Keep smiling. :001_smile:

 

I know the feeling well it's hard to talk about it even to close family (don't want them to worry). Been out of it for a while now(2years) and been in a dark hole ever since and believe me it's hard to claw yourself out. Been on tablets the lot doesn't fix anything just make you numb, I've got a long way yet but getting there, If it wasn't for my kids i would dread to think what i would have done.

Good on you Dr Stevie for bringing it up and beating it:001_smile:

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i used to do everything myself and thought others couldnt, my staff would get fed up with it and i thought they were useless, folk need to be given a chance and responsebilities, i was the problem in the business not the kit not the staff. kit does break down, but have a back up plan, staff do let you down, if so re arrange your day. i went for a recreational climb the other night with my new hitch climber. took the dogs as well. fantastic. i havent done that for over 10 years. dont put things off or hide from problems and confrontation, the worse case scenario is always the one in your head. john go see a hypno man, stop beating yourself up, what is done is done, life takes different directions for one reason or another. big boss beechwood, you have the mighty joe, why the hell do you need a roofmount anyway:001_tongue:

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i cant stress the importance of going and seeking advice from a proffesional enough. if your car broke down in your driveway would you just leave it there and try fixing it a wee bit every night although you have absolutely no mechanical knowledge, you might be lucky and find it, but it may take you 20 years. or call a maechanic, give him some money(which is all tax deductable)and get on your merry way. simples. i still go to see my head man as i call him every 4-6 months. just for a few pointers and advice. i am lucky, this guy has been self employed, employed and seen it all before he became a hypnotherapist. i went from 25k in overdraft to 20k in the bank under 6 months. all he did was straighten my head out. i find cutting trees easy, its the dealing with the customer and confrontation if something went wrong that got me, its just in my make up. its the way i am, i want to please others but when i dont get the response i want i would get resentfull. hating someone is like drinking poison and trying to kill someone else. it doesnt work it just eats you up.http://www.mansionhousehealthcare.co.uk/ heres my guys website. have a look. dare you. i sleep like a baby and go to the bog when i want now. dont have much money in the bank(because i like the shiny toys to make my life easier) but i am happy.

Edited by Steve Bullman
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I think from what ive seen in this game is you are very lucky to find guys that make you money if your running a buisness...90% will take the mick as soon as your back is turned and can never be left to there own devices,hence why i would never run a large firm evan though i could of been handed one on a plate.

 

my only stress is if clients are being unreasonable and there neighbours i very nearly cut some ones head off last week after he spoke to me like a complete 8888 all morning but was as nice as pie to the client when discussing the dispute ,i had to walk and leave a subbie to finish it otherwise some thing bad might of happened,now the client is refusing to pay the bill evan though i made the subbie ask her and make sure she was happy when he left,i will now have to go back and get confronted by the idiot next door again....

Got another irate call a day later with a regular customer biting my head off about her neighbours trees like its my fault...its getting hard to be polite....but then thats balanced out with s £100 tip from one job and the parish council telling me they had 5 calls with a job well done for another site! which cheered right up!

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now the client is refusing to pay the bill evan though i made the subbie ask her and make sure she was happy when he left

 

we now get the customer to sign our worksheet for three things-that the jobs done to spec, all cleared up nicely and no breakages/damages as a little something to fall back on

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but i am happy.

 

SWB: In response to all your posts here - RE--SPECT! The 4 words at the top of this are what it's all about. No point in being a millionaire if you're miserable with it - less is more.

To those still suffering; you've taken the bold step of sharing it somewhat and that can help loads I think. Best wishes to you from a happy but not rich me.

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I was self employed for 11 years working 7 days a week long days waiting for the money to come in then i gave it all up for a job in the countryside i go to work at 7.30 home for lunch and leave off at 4.30. same as Dr stevie i have no money but i sleep every night:001_smile:

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but i am happy.

 

SWB: In response to all your posts here - RE--SPECT! The 4 words at the top of this are what it's all about. No point in being a millionaire if you're miserable with it - less is more.

To those still suffering; you've taken the bold step of sharing it somewhat and that can help loads I think. Best wishes to you from a happy but not rich me.

 

thanks mate, remember why we do this job, to climb trees. i am lucky enough to enjoy the spoils of hyperactivity and maybe a touch of ocd from my latter years. i have property and i have some shiny kit. but you are right mate. it goes for nothing if you are miserable. when i started out i lived in a shack with no heating out in a field. i made a yard beside it and had bonfires all night, my own climbing pole and a motorcrosser for playing in the fields. it was bliss. 160 quid a month and that was it. i drive by it often and pay a visit to my mate that lives in it now, and i feel so at home. i think the secret to life in contentment, even now i am getting restless and feel there is something else i should be doing with my life, this isnt a dress rehearsal, and sods law if there is re_incarnation i will come back as a wilderbeast. if you are 18-25 and reading this, thinking what a lot of rubbish and are having a pint aswell. keep it that way, and enjoy your lovely lifestyle :001_smile:

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AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! Is the fact that the above is the commonest and most prevelant thing going through my head at any one time a sign......and the fact i can relate to heartburn, temper etc etc etc.........that i am stressed. Does anyone else here ever wonder if there is any point to it?

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I think from what ive seen in this game is you are very lucky to find guys that make you money if your running a buisness...90% will take the mick as soon as your back is turned and can never be left to there own devices,!

 

:dito:

 

Totally agree Matty!!

 

I've been there and done that, got sick of calls saying it couldn't be done.

 

Or sending them to do a half day job that took all day :thumbdown:

 

If I hit a problem, I very quickly look for and find a solution, I found that unsupervised staff just looked for problems so they did not have to work :mad1:

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