a question to all you dads or sons out there

[arbogrunt]

I think any time you spend with your kids is always a great thing, whatever you do!. I've got 3 boys and every now and then I take them out on jobs. It teaches them the value of 'grafting' for a living (none of them want to follow in my footsteps - so this might the only proper 'days work' they'll ever do!). When they work hard (and I do make them work), they appreciate the money I pay them at the end of the day. They are also Scouts/footballers/rugby players etc and one of them is in the local swimming club. My little girl just wants to go shopping - thats the wifes department!. As long as they are happy and healthy its got to be a good thing!

[Rob D]

I reckon you're spot on Stevie. You're boy sounds happy and healthy - I wish you were my dad!

 

But learning to swim is important and as you get older you're more afraid of doing it. You may take precautions with water but at some point your son will be messing about near a lake...

 

Why don't you go and do some swimming lessons together?

[Mick Stockbridge]

Break the Blair cycle and teach your boys to swim Stevie, then in turn they'll teach their kids to swim and you never know it may save one of your offspring one day.

[Stephen Blair]

Break the Blair cycle and teach your boys to swim Stevie, then in turn they'll teach their kids to swim and you never know it may save one of your offspring one day.

 

thats a great way of putting it mick, thats the kind of thing that sinks into my brain through the sawdust and diesel fumes. cheers:thumbup:

[PeteB]

Stevie, go for it - get swimming lessons. I went swimming with my two every wednesday evening for the last 5 years (divorced dad's thing) and really enjoyed knowing that they will be safe around water and confident in future adventures beyond my time with them. Having fun on diggers etc is a great thing too, I mess with engines and gearboxes with my son and try shopping with my daughter although it fills me with dread. Happy times though always.

 

Best regards

[Ian Leach]

Stevie your doing a great job, if they turn out even half like you are then there going to be fantastic kids. Your advice and help has been second to none.

[Stephen Blair]

cheers mate, kind words:thumbup1:

[Frank]

My boys are my world(and the wife lol)i just want to do it right, you guys will know what i mean.

 

Stevie. There is no right or wrong way of bringing up children. There are countless guidelines and theories etc. But, every child is different. Every family unit is different.

Think about your boys. Are they putting weight on, sleeping at night and laughing / smiling during the day????

I'd hazard a guess that the answer is YES. I feel I know you fairly well and believe me when I say I respect your outlook on life, your attitude towards things and your thoughtfulness. I would take advice on parenting from you any day (and i have an 8 year old lad).

 

Keep doing what your doing. If you feel strongly that you havent done enough with them that day, then you probably havent. Hence the "feeling".

 

Swimming is a good life skill to have, I could get by in an emergency but Im no olympic contender. I learnt how to swim at school. Not from my dad. He was one of those "chuck him in and see how he gets on types".

 

The only time you should be worried is if the lad was standing by the front door waiting for you desperate to do something, but you were too busy elsewhere.

 

The things you are obviously teaching him are strong minded, hard working attitude, which WILL enable him to go far. Im sure.

[Mozza]

i am having a bit of a dad mini crisis just now, my eldest is 4, all my activities with him always end up in something that revolves around my work, he is 4 and still cant ride a bike or swim but he can do a 3 point turn in his john deere gator and fill it with his mini digger, he can sweep up and shovel sand better than a lot of my old employees and loves getting stuck in with chores. this is how i was brought up, i am crap at swimming and cant be bothered with team sports and those types of activities. Now sometimes when i was younger i would of rather of been playing with my pals but the chance of driving a tractor or playing with an axe, air gun, building fires and dens and helping my dad do logs was always what i wanted to do. And when i left school at 15 i was head and shoulders ahead of work colleagues in their 20's. I remember getting the tractor unstuck on my first week after the boss couldnt, and i never winged about hard work. Now on thurday i decided i would do 'normal' stuff with my boy. But i bought a mini digger today and me and xander are going for it, is this bad? I wasnt even bothered about it until i told him and his excitement was infectious. is this good or am i neglecting my dad duties, is teaching him to swim far more important? As a family, the Blairs arent swimmers, my parents dont and me and my brother are like bricks. We just respect water and take the appropriate precautions when need be. Am i worrying about nothing??

 

I dont think theres anything wrong with what your doing pal, it seems like hes enjoying himself and loving life the way it is, However i do think being able to swim is a must for any child, Im not talking 4 lessons a week to make the great at swimming but to have some grasp of keeping themselves afloat and not be scared of the water because they cant swim is a must.

 

I went threw the same thing when i met my mrs, Her lad was 4 then, when i was 4 id been swimming with school for a while and could swim pretty well, so when we went on holiday to wales, we went to the pool and i just binned him in, didnt think for one second he might not be able to swim I felt awful after, So i spent time with him getting up to speed, He did well by the end of the week and loved it, he felt comfortable playing with the other kids and if he fell in he could keep himself from going under and swim to the side, He was made up

[Dean Lofthouse]

The way I look at it is:

 

I had a very rough upbringing, very deprived, violent father who used to hospitalise my mother on a regular basis, whilst we cowered in a corner.

 

I stand back and look at others such as Stevie who dedicate themselves to their children. I gain great pleasure from seeing such love and devotion.

 

You might punish yourself a little for not spending enough time with your kids but just pat yourself on the backs for being excellent parents and giving your kids a decent and loving enviroment to grow up in.

 

My kids have been brought up to hopefully respect others, detest bullying, and appreciate what they have at the same time as respecting what others dont have.

 

I have difficulty showing emotion because of the violence in my upbringing, but my kids know me well enough to see the subtle ways in which I show love and appreciation.

 

Keep up the good work Stevie, you are a model dad (not as in model good looking BTW )