Things you don't want to find on the Job.

[Billhook]

On a remote layby near here  the council had nailed a sign on a tree saying “ No dumping of litter; maximum fine £20,000”

i found a dozen porno magazines had been dumped right under the sign.  Naturally it was my duty to inspect and to my surprise i discovered a name and address in the middle of the pile and the address was only a couple of miles away.  I phoned the council and the local enforcement officer appeared and took away the evidence, i presume to do a secondary inspection in the privacy of his office.  I never expected to hear any more but to my surprise in the local paper a couple of months later a local man was named and shamed for litter dumping and fined £200.  He was not quite shamed enough as they did not mention the porn bit in the press article!

[DuncanH]

I did a clearing job in a SSSI before some road repairs could take place after a landslip, just below a layby. In a single stretch maybe 40m x 5m I found 20+ tyres, some with rims, bags of sawdust, empty gas canisters, bottles, shoes. I was clearing head high bracken and you couldn't see far into it so it was clear a couple of metres then remove litter then move to the next couple of metres. Really tedious!
And one of the reasons it was SSSI was because of adders and slow worms so as I was working I had to be careful not to hit any. We ended up moving 6 or 7 adders (catching them in buckets was fun!) and dozens of slow worms. The job spec was brushcut about 5cm off the ground, do a fingertip search of the area for reptiles then strim to ground level.

When they rebuilt the road they left out the layby

[arbogrunt]

we had to fell some Alders at a gay dogging site. One of the climbers turned up a few days into the job, after his holiday and didn't realise the situation... 'What have we got to do here then?'....'see that bloke sitting in the car over there, he's the Tree Officer, go and ask him what the score is'.......what utter bounders!

[Peasgood]

I read this site regularly, as a farmer looking for tips on which saw to buy kind of thing and also some of the safety aspects of cutting up/down trees.

Two things really astonish me about you guys, the first is the apparent alarm of anybody cutting down a tree despite your job being cutting down trees and secondly your acceptance of dog shit in your working day. I don't try to understand the first and will never understand the second.

[csservices]

Did one site clearance where the bushes and ground in one area were liberally covered in discarded knickers and used condoms, apparently it was where the locals took their lady of the night.

Another site clearance found a car gearbox with the forestry mulcher, that made a row [emoji1]

[Mick Dempsey]

9 hours ago, Peasgood said:

I read this site regularly, as a farmer looking for tips on which saw to buy kind of thing and also some of the safety aspects of cutting up/down trees.

Two things really astonish me about you guys, the first is the apparent alarm of anybody cutting down a tree despite your job being cutting down trees and secondly your acceptance of dog shit in your working day. I don't try to understand the first and will never understand the second.

Good points.

 

re the dog mess. When you turn up at a job and there’s stuff on the garden, you have a few choices.

 

1: Ask to borrow a shovel and clear up what you can whilst making disgusted noises, then do your job to get the money.  (Recommended)

 

2: Ask the client to clear it up. (Not recommended but sounds good)

 

3: Walk away, thereby losing a days money and a client. (Try explaining that to your business manager at the bank)

 

 

[felixthelogchopper]

12 hours ago, arbogrunt said:

we had to fell some Alders at a gay dogging site. One of the climbers turned up a few days into the job, after his holiday and didn't realise the situation... 'What have we got to do here then?'....'see that bloke sitting in the car over there, he's the Tree Officer, go and ask him what the score is'.......what utter bounders!

Poor old Si.

[arbogrunt]

11 minutes ago, felixthelogchopper said:

Poor old Si.

ha ha ha!...thankfully he realised something wasnt quite right!

the horrendous polaroid pics that were found there, found there way into various lunch boxes and window visors over the next week or so...gopping!. We're back there soon doing some felling...not a pleasant work environment

[felixthelogchopper]

Just now, arbogrunt said:

ha ha ha!...thankfully he realised something wasnt quite right!

the horrendous polaroid pics that were found there, found there way into various lunch boxes and window visors over the next week or so...gopping!. We're back there soon doing some felling...not a pleasant work environment

Very true. At least the Great Bumming Tree is no more. You could always have a good fast drive through the ford to help clear the area a bit. Just watch where you step in the car park.

[Khriss]

Was that little ginger Simon by any chance Felix ? K