David Cropper
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Everything posted by David Cropper
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Hang on a minute, Young Demsey. The last couple of your "loin longings" concerned firstly, Krankie then for quite a long time, Dame Vera. What's happening to you? Get a grip!
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Good for you mate! Sounds like you had a crap time when you were a kid, pulled yourself out of it, thank goodness. Army will make or break you, obviously didn't break you.
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Trust a Welshman to notice that.
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You see why I'm not usually let out on my own.
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Not chainsaw trousers but trousers. Put my new keks on this morning to go and get dog food from supermarket. Wife compliments me, off I trot, gets dog food, returns home, wife starts to laugh then cry, I look confused, she explains that I haven't removed the labels. A coconut every time.
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Here we go again! Peace and quiet's gone to get crap again.
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No, for the Love of Christ, no!
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I'm beginning to think he's a lost cause in the women stakes. I told him last winter when he was on about being cold in his van, " Get yourself a fat bird, she'll keep you warm". Did he take my good advice? No he did not.
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This thread's turning into bleeding Tinder!
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That's what I had when I was Emergency Response Supervisor at BP Wytch Farm as the on call vehicle. Ferguson system, bleeding horrible trying to get it into 4x4! To save a few quid, BP fitted it with road tyres, first time out off road, got bogged in. Needed a Discovery to drag me out, they were our response vehicles for the gaffers to get to the incident site quickly.
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You will get what's called a false rut, it's like a second go at breeding. Usually when the weather gets milder. Happens with Sika so I assume that Fallow will as well.
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I know my place. Its below the dog.
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She's ex squaddie, Eggs, guaranteed a sense of humour. Even so, tread carefully, don't forget, women ain't human when weight is mentioned. I know to my peril. You've seen the photo of my wife with our bulldog, she's tiny, but frightens the crap out of me if she thinks I'm even hinting she's put weight on. Listen to an older, wiser man, my boy.
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I might be big and daft, but I ain't suicidal. Hard stare? My wife's Jockenese, they invented the hard stare. I'm afraid Eggs didn't pass the exam for the Diplomatic Corps.
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Christ Alive, Eggs! Have you learnt nothing? NEVER tell a lady she needs to wear an elasticated waistband!
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How quaint.
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Ah, finally, the voice of sanity prevails in a discussion that's turning quite nasty. As to the aforementioned three birds in lime jelly, I applaud your thinking, Mr Johnson, however, my fantasy will definitely exclude you from romping around. Call me old fashioned if you will.
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Oi! -
Nobody seems to realise that the Herberts who did this could actually be following this story on here. Just a thought to be aware of.
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A Continental Bulldog. Basically a bred down English without the breathing problems. Look it up on Wikipedia Eggs.
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He's nearly as big as my wife!
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Thanks, I think.
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Cheeky sod, Eggs! I've lost 2 stone since March. Now I am merely chunky.
