Jokes???

[SamanthaSunny]

[scbk]

4 hours ago, SamanthaSunny said:

Looks more like town planning for beginners, lamppost in footpath blocking wheelchairs & buggies, cycle path not wide enough for 2 way use (no sign of cycle path on far side of road), traffic islands preventing overtaking. No doubt the cycle path crosses every side road, which seems to be where most accidents occur. 

[Stubby]

1 hour ago, scbk said:

Looks more like town planning for beginners, lamppost in footpath blocking wheelchairs & buggies, cycle path not wide enough for 2 way use (no sign of cycle path on far side of road), traffic islands preventing overtaking. No doubt the cycle path crosses every side road, which seems to be where most accidents occur. 

How can it not cross every side road ? just curious ...

[Mark J]

[Logdaft]

A store that sells new husbands has opened in the Northeast , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

[David Cropper]

[woodlover2]

What do you call a hen looking at lettuce? Chicken sees a salad.

[woodlover2]

I asked my grandmother how she is enjoying her new stairlift. She said It’s driving her up the wall.

[woodlover2]

Due to the Covid pandemic, the Germans are preparing a plan for life with a dramatically reduced supply of sausage and cheese. It was their wurst käse scenario.

[scbk]

If the Indian variant doesn't get named Vindaflu I'm giving up on humanity.