Jokes???

[Big J]

[WirralBoy]

[Rac man]

[Rich Rule]

A woman goes into Discount Fishing Supplies to buy a rod and reel for her grandson’s birthday. She doesn’t know which one to get, so she just picks one and goes over to the counter. The salesman is standing there, wearing dark shades.

She says, “Excuse me. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?”

He says, “Madam, I’m completely blind; but if you’ll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes.”

She doesn’t believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.

He says, “That’s a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-lb..Test line. It’s a good all around combination, and it’s actually on sale this week for $44.”

She says, “That’s amazing that you can tell all that, just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I’ll take it!”

As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.

“Oh, that sounds like a Visa card,” he says.

As the lady bends down to pick up the card, she accidentally farts..

At first she’s really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind salesman would tell exactly who had farted.

The man rings up the sale and says, “That’ll be $58.50 please.”

The woman is totally confused by this and asks, “Didn’t you tell me it was on sale for $44. How did you get $58.50?”

“The Duck Caller is $11, and the Fish Bait is $3.50."🤣🤣🤣🤣

[eggsarascal]

On 12/10/2023 at 10:06, Logdaft said:

Reminded me of the Mrs Merton gag. Debbie, what first attracted you to the multimillionaire Paul Daniels…

[sime42]

 

Edited October 19, 2023 by sime42

[Whoppa Choppa]

 

 

[Doug Tait]

A woman hears a humming sound when passing her daughter's bedroom, she goes in to find her daughter naked using a vibrator.

"What on earth are you doing?" she says.

"I'm 35yrs old mum, this is the closest I'll ever get to having a husband!".

 

The following week dad hears a humming from the basement and goes down to find his daughter naked with her vibrator.

"What on earth are you doing?" he asks.

"Dad I'm 35yrs old, this is the closest I'll ever get to having a husband!".

 

Come the weekend the daughter gets home from the shops to find her dad on the couch in front of the TV with the vibrator humming beside him.

"What on earth are you doing dad?" she shouts.

 

"Calm down dear, I'm just spending some quality time with my new son in law".

[Logdaft]

[Logdaft]