Quite a few years ago I was fond of the occasional recreational ciggarette, on on occasion I came home from work ( as an agricultural engineer ) and had a shower as normal. By the time i got out a friend had arrived, he'd been given a lift ( I lived out on a farm ). We had a bit of gear so decided to get a little wasted, to save time i did'nt bother dressing and, wearing a bathrobe ate a yoghurt with about an eighth crumbled into it, while we were waiting for this to take effect we had a few splifs. It seemed to take a while for the yoghurts to work but eventually thay did.
After a few hours and some munbchies my mate wanted a lift home, it was about ten miles along quiet country roads so despite feeling a little dodgy i decided to drive him home. On the way there we drove in silence, both utterly wasted, in my peripheral vision all i could see was coloured shapes and pictures spinning around. On the way back whilst in a particularly remote spot I hit a badger, they make a surprisingly big bang when you hit one with a mark one fiesta. The problem was , it was'nt dead. I reversed around it so i could see it in the headlights, it was half dead trying to scrabble asross the road. I could'nt leave it like that so I decided to finish it off, I did'nt have any weapon as such so as I was next to a wood i thought I'd get a stick from there. Climbing across a barbed wire fence wearing nothing but a bath robe and a pair of rigger boots is'nt easy, but i managed it and rummaging about in the brambles I eventually found a log, it was a bit big really being around 6' long and about 4" thick but it was all i could find in the dark. I eventually managed to get back across the fence with my caber and dispatch the beast.
Picture the scene a family going away for the weekend the kids bored in the back after a long drive, now finally nearing the holiday cottage they drive along the dark country road. Then on rounding a bend they see silouetted in the headlights a crazed monster wearing nothing but a pair of rigger boots and a bath robe billowing in the wind weilding a large log pummeling a defenceless woodland creature to death.....
Whoever you are I am truely sorry.