motivation

[Andy Collins]

That seems to be a common fault among fathers of a certain age.

 

And guess what...I see myself being just the same with my eldest. Why do we find it so hard to praise, and yet so easy to criticise?

[skyhuck]

Sounds like a very honourable man. What would have happened had his creditors not agreed to wait for their money, and applied to make him bankrupt?

 

They knew him, they knew he would not let them down.

 

As I recall some of the ones who knew him better were prepared to wait while he sorted the less friendly ones such as the VAT man and rates people.

 

He also made a point of keeping them all fully informed of the situation, so they knew he was trying to not pay.

[bob]

The Kids enjoying the log plume at lego land, note our jodies face second from front, she was really enjoying it, poor quality scanned

 

was that the wife at the back

and obviously you did have some hair:blushing:

[Stephen Blair]

And guess what...I see myself being just the same with my eldest. Why do we find it so hard to praise, and yet so easy to criticise?

 

you are following the same pattern of your father Andy, it is built in from an early age, you only knew one father so you are just copying his ways. Take the first step, tell him you are proud of him, even if its just a text at first. My dad talks to me with a lot of respect on hte phone and tells everyone else how proud he is of me, then face to face he gets on his critical high horse and i just shut down and ignore him. If someone trreats me like a kid then i will act like one, if someone treats me like a man then i will return the favour:001_smile:

[Mr Ed]

They knew him, they knew he would not let them down.

 

As I recall some of the ones who knew him better were prepared to wait while he sorted the less friendly ones such as the VAT man and rates people.

 

He also made a point of keeping them all fully informed of the situation, so they knew he was trying to not pay.

 

 

He was lucky in that they were willing to wait, and he was smart to keep them informed.

 

I was in exactly the same boat, I paid off all my staff, all my trade accounts, and was slowly paying back the bank and Vat man. I sold my brand new house to keep on paying back.

Unfortunately, I had 1 finance agreement outstanding, I was paying 1/2 payments to them. Then they were bought out by a much bigger finance company, who insisted on all small accounts in arrears being settled in full. I could not settle, so they made me bankrupt.

By this time I only owed them, the bank and the VAT.

 

Sometimes, circumstance forces things beyond your control.

[Andy Collins]

you are following the same pattern of your father Andy, it is built in from an early age, you only knew one father so you are just copying his ways. Take the first step, tell him you are proud of him, even if its just a text at first. My dad talks to me with a lot of respect on hte phone and tells everyone else how proud he is of me, then face to face he gets on his critical high horse and i just shut down and ignore him. If someone trreats me like a kid then i will act like one, if someone treats me like a man then i will return the favour:001_smile:

 

I think I criticise in a positive way, but it may not come out as I intend. I respect him for what he's doing at a young age, and the work he puts in. But the "well dones" and the "wow thats great" comments dont flow easily. I do try to speak to him as an equal, not in any way superior in manner. And as this is about motivation, perhaps these words would encourage and motivate him

[jojam]

What motivates me?Have to keep the sawdust pumping through my veins!Been there with the failed business too,had a harvester go on fire and insurance non payment.Took five years to clear everything up,probably took five years off my life but the way of life still motivates me to get up every morning.

[Dean Lofthouse]

was that the wife at the back

and obviously you did have some hair:blushing:

 

I used to have hair, that was about ten years ago

[Rob D]

I used to have hair, that was about ten years ago

 

 

R you sure Dean? It doesn't look a very good likeness of you in that pic!!

[Saw-sick Steve]

I suppose my motivation is to make my Dad proud of my achievement. Though he died 7yers ago, I like to think he looks down and thinks I'm doing ok. He worked in the job for many years, and still worked up to his death. He never really said much in the way of encouragement when we worked, but he was always telling everyone else how good I was.

My Dad, who died 2yrs ago this Xmas, was just the same. Always taking the mick, never letting you get too full of yourself, never praising to your face, only to others. Now I find myself doing the exact same thing to my boy ( but not my maid), and have to check meself some times. Why do we do it?