AHPP

Fine. That then. As long as it’s not regrowth miles out on branches that you want a cherry picker to easily reach. A twiglet (perhaps with some very short branches) can be maintained by one man with gear that fits in a rucksack. Silky off a set of steps on a sunny Saturday. Bottles of cider round the fire afterwards. Jumpers for goalposts. Albion.

That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s correct. I once had a very interesting chat with a bloke who worked for a major legal database provider. His firm employs hundreds of people in the UK and thousands worldwide, keeping up with changes, keeping track of what the law was five minutes ago and what the law is now. Literally that quickly. He said he occasionally bumps into the people who do the same job for the government. All five of them.

Also consider (and compel others to consider) the environmental impact of longwinded tree management. 3 men, 2 chainsaws, 1 cherry picker and a fire in the corner of the garden would cause x amount of pollution once and leave a pile of logs behind to help with home heating. Plant some suitable stuff elsewhere if further indulgence is desired. The alternative is loads of driving to meetings, hearings, site visits etc, then the same cherry picker and men to do some pruning, now not once but once every three years (that’s 60 times for a building with a life of 180 years). If the tree breaks and damages a building, car, dog or human, you’re now into more diesel and machines for builders, panel beaters, vets or ambulances, and the tree blokes again, and the problem still won’t be solved. That’s more pollution than x. The council will have some hogwash eco duty they may want to comply with. Shove that in their faces. Good luck.

And have a takedown team ready to move very quickly.

I thought from some of your previous posts that you were a more mature and senior gentlemen, riding out your career in a council job or similar. This makes you sound like much more of a tree slayer in his prime. What do you do if you don’t mind me asking?

The thought of trying to make some dreadful council arsehole see sense on a matter like this makes my blood run cold. The very best of luck with it.

I’m very sympathetic to the tree owner and/or owner of either of the houses that will one day have a willow branch on the roof. Really shit tree. 2.5m or 3m off is sort of helpful and sort of absolutely not. It would get the main scaffold back just enough to miss the old buildings if it fails and hinges at that tight Y union but it would add loads of regrowth weight and make the failure a near certainty rather than a probability. Right back to a twiglet or remove would be far better. The regular maintenance agreement daltontrees suggested could be a workable compromise but only if the scene-setting prune/“pollard” is hard enough. Otherwise it’s putting the tree owner on the hook for cherry picker hire every three years for not enough benefit. I’d want the twiglet or very close.

I’m even nearly a car bloke. Watch MCM and a few other bits on YouTube and hand a mate spanners while he tries to make his beemer go faster.

Good lord. A meme I didn’t know. I’m quite up on them usually. Genuinely thought it was an otter. I am ironically booking an eye test tomorrow.

Sorry. Straight over my head.

Probably. Do you enjoy a spanking now as well?

Is that an otter?

Sounds like his problem, not yours.

Axe with a sharp profile so you can stick it in things and not lose it and even cut a stuck saw out in extremis.

I’ve got some pretty heavy rubber conveyor belt scrap (half inch maybe) that I’m going to make into a scraper for clearing concrete, tarmac etc. Will sandwich a strip between two 2x4s and pinch it with the grab. Would be delighted if that worked on grass too. Could make a double sided one with more rubber sticking out one side than the other. Say a relatively stiff 2” rubber tongue for concrete and a floppier 6” tongue for grass.

Amateurs. I’ve got lots of unstarted projects.

I've retrospectively invented all sorts over the years: lifting hydrofoils, the recumbent bicycle, supercharging steam engines, crème brûlée.

God bless arbtalk and all who sail in her, you particularly. They're only half an hour from me and I need to go in that direction to see my stylist anyway.

A 661 over a 500i would save you five minutes at the very most ringing up that oak, maybe ten minutes over a 261. An 881 would be the same or even cost you time, walking to the van, psyching yourself up to carry the bastard, starting it without blowing a shoulder etc. But say you had a five foot DBH stem tapering to three feet at forty feet. Now that is 661/881 territory and you could save maybe forty minutes over a 500i on just the ringing but also probably have the job flow better getting cookies off faster, say twenty minutes for round numbers. Two saws is the key, the shorter bar with a semi chisel chain for dirty bits, ripping/noodling cookies, including ripping/noodling them off stems. For me, that's a 25" on my 500i (semi is also a bit kinder on ropes, trouser legs etc when climbing) and 36" 661 with full chisel for ringing. And don't be shy about changing chains. It's been years since I used an 880 and my memory's shit so I can't speak from absolute gospel first hand experience but I've been around them in use and I'd go with plogs and Saul's appraisal; they're no quicker, sometimes slower. It would be a truly exceptional arb job where 881 pros would outweigh the cons. Plus a 550i and 661 team are the same bar mount and would go on a double end bar if you get into milling later.

That's the current plan. The risk is of course putting it to use, immediately destroying fifty quid of broom heads and going and buying a proper one in a bad mood. Nothing ventured, nothing gained though.

I feared that was the answer because I've seen those and they're not cheap. I was hoping for something I could homebrew for ten and six like doobin's haybob rake.

What's the perfect rake for mechanised cleaning up big domestic jobs?

Nice. Thanks. Short thread.

Watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1 and came to a scene where some wizards grow a bridge over a river. Idly wondering why that couldn’t actually be done. People train willow into arches etc. You could plait roots from riverside willows (or whatever), build a frame for them to follow. Would they need watering or perhaps cladding in earth and/or burlap? Could be a nice project for someone patient. Anyone seen anything like this?

Are haybob tines gentle enough to use on a domestic lawn or do they leave scores?