Jokes???

[Gareth Smith]

A girl calls her Mother, Mum I'm getting a divorce. 'A Divorce? Why?' The mother asks shocked, 'Mum all he wants is bum sex. I used to have a lovely little bumhole the size of a 5p piece. Now it's the size of a 50p piece. The mother says, 'Sweetie, you have a lovely home, a porsche, a platinum credit card, villa in marbella, kids in private school, and 6 holidays a year and you want to give all that up for the sake of 45p?

[Lorry thompson]

Got in a fight with a towel today.Wiped the floor with it.

[Lyn Ed]

A welshman gets washed up on a desert island with just a sheep and a collie dog for company, after a few days he starts to feel a little frisky and starts eyeing up the sheep, the collie dogs instincts kick in and it wont let him anywhere near the sheep. The following morning to his delight a beautiful young girl is washed ashore "can you do me a favour" asks the welshman "anything you want" says the girl "can you take this bloody dog for a walk"

[Lorry thompson]

Ever since she fell pregnant my wife has really objected to the noise coming from the brothel downstairs.Must be the whore moans.

 

 

I have a bad taste in sad jokes I reckon my jokes might spoil this thread too haha

[kernowstu]

two goldfish in a tank,one says to the other these are buggers to drive

[Lorry thompson]

Thems the jokes I like haha

[Mark J]

My grandad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from Edinburgh zoo.

[Lorry thompson]

The Priest at the church near mine killed 5 people at 12 midnight on Christmas Eve last year.He was a Mass Murderer.

[Tommy_B]

Thems the jokes I like haha

 

Two Parrots sitting on a Perch. One of them says "Can you smell fish?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get my coat....

[Matthew Arnold]

Two Parrots sitting on a Perch. One of them says "Can you smell fish?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll get my coat....

 

 

Took nearly a minute fore my parents to get that one lol. How sad.