Jokes???

[eggsarascal]

I asked  North Korean what it was like to live there. He said can't complain.

[Paul Cleaver]

On ‎17‎/‎05‎/‎2019 at 11:36, Gary Prentice said:

Bishop has to move forward diagonally!

pity this pic was not in Prague - the bloke standing behind the Queen could have been her Czech mate

[felixthelogchopper]

An elderly woman, well into her eighties, slowly entered the front door of a 'Sex Shop'.

Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbled the few feet across to the counter.

Finally grabbing the counter for support, and s-tut-ter- ing, she asked the sales clerk, "Dooo youuuu have dilllldooos?"

The clerk, (trying hard not to laugh), politely replied, "Yes we do have dildos. Actually we carry many different models. . ."

The old woman then asked: "Doooo youuuu carry aaa pppinkk onnee, tttenn inchessss lllong aaandd aabboutt ttwoo inchesss ththiickk ... aaand rrunns on bbaatteries?"

Trying not to laugh, and with a little smile creeping around his mouth, the clerk responded, "Yes, yes we do."

She stammered, "Dddooo yyoouu kknnnooww hhhoww ttooo ttturrrnn iittt offff?"

[eggsarascal]

Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn are on a plane.
Corbyn looked at May, chuckled and said, "You know, I could throw a £1,000 note out of the window right now and make somebody happy." 
May shrugged her shoulders and replied, "I could throw ten £100 notes out of the window and make ten people happy" 
Hearing… their exchange, the pilot said to his co-pilot, I could throw both of them out of the window and make 64 million people very, very happy!" ..

[felixthelogchopper]

https://www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/tommy-robinsons-guide-to-coping-with-rejection-20190528186025?fbclid=IwAR1OtqnT6kHLN2SJmLQ-D_zF-TRUgvM3pSb2EMjukwpA2k8dYpwzR9RX7MA

[timbernut]

Felt the need t share this as it really made me chuckle, it’s in a field entrance down the road from me, spotted it while walk-in dog:

[kevinjohnsonmbe]

[Ratman]

[kevinjohnsonmbe]

[felixthelogchopper]