Mike Dempsey

The difficulty is that woodturners are amongst most titest of all kind of people ever born. You would have more chance of winning the eurolottery double rollover than getting a woodturner to part with cash for wood!

and your patio/path is looking good?

I'm doing fine now Jon. Recently divorced but fighting back and starting to enjoy life. Just keeping on churning out the different items. How about you?

Only if I can sell it for the same rip off price as Nike sell the tops for!

Its a wee while since I have posted up here so I thought it was about time I did something about it. Im heading south of the border for at least 3 events in the next few months so I thought I better get my finger out and make some items which would be more appropriate for the potential customers. Hope you like them. Open to more suggestions for more 'English' type products.

I worked in a ten pin bowling alley many years ago and have seen a lot worse than that. At least 3 or 4 people over arm bowling like as in cricket. That doesnt half smash up the lane! not to mention piss off the owner. The number of drunk guys running down the lane to put a couple pins back up so the can have another shot, you wouldnt believe it!

2nd hand on ebay perhaps

Im ok as I was 60 a few months ago, so I wont get called up. Can you imagine the number of complaints being made by new recruits because, "someone shouted at me and I dont like it!"

It wasnt me, how about Ian Leach?

I remember this being on the news about her as my dad had the same thing. He never did anything about it though as he was in enough pain from his ankylosis spondylitis and didnt want more time in hospital.

Thanks guys for your replies. I will order up some hydraulic oil and swap it out. I got a big agricultural engineering workshops near me so that is my last shot remedy. I'm just pissed off that it's not been very good from day one and has already been in workshops 3 times to sort this problem. It works for a few months and then is crap again. It was sold by Riko originally but I see they don't sell this brand anymore.

Got this Uniforest vertical logsplitter about 3 years ago at start of lockdown. It never had much power in it and it was back at the Scottish reps place 3 times to be sorted. He had an agricultural engineers place nearby look at it and sort it. Im sure it was definitely a Friday build. However I persevered with it and its only split about 4 cube a year so hardly overworked. A couple of days ago it started to play up again. The anvil was very slow to come down and would only touch the timber before it stopped. Now it only comes down about 8 inches before grinding to a halt and doesnt even touch the timber. Normally I can take my hand of either of the levers and the anvil does not go up. Now when I hold down the rhs handle the anvil stays put but when I hold down the lhs handle the anvil rises. There is a vertical lever which can be used for limiting the amount of rise the anvil has to save time. Its connected to a switch type of mechanism at the bottom. If I press down on this switch with my foot the the anvil operates at normal speed and will split wood ok without me holding both or one of the levers! The instructions for the hydraulic oil are a bit weird - see attached photo. Is there air in the hydraulic fluid, does it matter. I dont know and I am relying on more knowledgeable people on here for advice. Many thanks in advance.

I did all my Christmas shopping in five minutes this year. The only reason it took so long was the lassie in Next had massive long false fingernails and it took her ages to get the gift cards into the envelopes and operate the till as she couldnt press the buttons very easily!

Kylie Minogue, Robbie Williams and Elton John were walking over a bridge. Kylie trips and gets her head jammed between the railings. With a sideways glance, Robbie pulls aside her G-String, and bonks her senseless! He stands back and tells Elton, "Your turn!" Elton bursts into tears. "What's up?" asks Robbie. Elton sobs, "My head wont fit through the railings!!"

Saw this today on a 12" dbh sycamore and wondered what it was. The bottom things are all snails and there must be at least 100 of them. Sorry if pictures are crap. Its about 8' off the ground in not brilliant light conditions.

Thats what I was thinking. And was there a shotgun involved somewhere down the line!

I cant actually believe someone is asking this question!

Who do you think taught Edie the Eagle how to do it properly!

On the plus side of all these low temps we are having is that the snow at Glenshee ski resort isnt melting within a day of falling and I might get a day or two in before Xmas

A Gary Larson Far Side classic!

Expensive compared to PVA glue which you can buy for about a tenner for 5L in builders merchants. Just add a litre or 2 of water to aid penetration and paint the end of the logs with it. If the end of the logs are very dry you can soak them with water to aid penetration of the glue. Unlike wax it wont flake off and works very well.

The PVA glue method does work and I've been doing it for 30 years.