Favourite saying or one liner’s.

[RPA]

The difference between fiction and reality?

Fiction has to make sense.

 

Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.

[PeteB]

"Yes Missus, if it wasn't for the mess, you wouldn't know we'ed been".

 

"short of nought we ain't got"!

 

"two sugars in mine"

 

"his lift doesn't go to the top floor"

 

"her light's on, but nobody is in"

 

"legs like condoms full of pebbles"

 

"never seen that happen before"

 

"they will ride up with wear"

 

"it's the newness, sir"

 

"that'll polish out I'm sure"

[Paul Barton]

"but this one goes up to eleven"

[Arborist]

DILLIGAF!!

 

Do i look like I give a Fu*k.

[PeteB]

"Well, that dog won't hunt"

 

"Pass the big hammer, that'll move it"!

 

"You got that metric adjustable"?

 

"What do ya mean, too dear? Christ that's cheap"!

 

"How much, can you do it for the timber"?

[bob]

i like trees but

 

fell it from bottom

 

2 breakfasts for tree fellers

 

my favourite is

tea milk 2 sugars

[vduben]

more of one i dont like from customers....

''can you just.........''

reply

''yeah 50quid cash''

[A_lopa]

A face like 5 miles of bad road..

[vduben]

im not going to lie to you..................

[skyhuck]

Please do not be offended!

 

Fart and give me a clue

 

Give her a slap and ride the ripples

 

Niether from personal experiance

 

"sprinkle some talc on and look for the damp patch"