peds

Meaning that it hasn't been tested by squirting it into the eyes of the poor lickle bunny rabbits, like most bubble baths. Without checking, and I could well be wrong here, I definitely wouldn't be surprised if there were ingredients of animal origin in bubble bath. They really do turn up in the strangest of places. With regards to the firewood though... yeah, not sure what that's all about. I do insist on my firewood being free-range, however.

Put apples, both perfect or bruised and blemished, chopped or whole, unpeeled, in a big pan with a bit of water. Boil until soft, then mash through a colander, or press through a food mill or moulin. Boil until a bit drier, then mix with about the same quantity, or a bit less, of sugar, and any spices you might want... cinnamon, clove, dry ginger, you know the story. Boil until it looks like it'll set, or Google the correct temperature to bring it to. 105° or something, probably. Look for recipes for apple cheese, apple jam, black butter, or something like that, if you need to follow something more specific.

It was probably a very small tree when it was planted.

You've just got... like... zero positive attributes as a human being, have you? You're just... a big leaking sack of hatred. It must be exhausting.

High-brow comedy right here. Real top-drawer wit.

Poor cottage. 75 euro of scrap metal in the roof and pipes. Big pile of stone stacked up in a corner for landscaping. Spare soil spread out over the future growspace, lots of mineral-rich dab. I'll scatter some green manure seeds over it a little later in the year, and the polytunnels can go up next spring. With most of the lumps ironed out, we decided to camp out among the stones and bones of the old building. A few decent bits of wood from the roof were saved from destruction. Some newer lengths, still with a practical application in the shipping container shed roof, and some ancient pieces that just spoke to me. Square nails, that sort of thing. They might end up as garden paperweights, or they might find some noble purpose in the future. Managed to nudge a shipping container 5 metres to the left (the delivery crane couldn't reach the intended location, the digger helped out), and dropped a layer of stone between the two. Just need to get a roof over them and a smooth floor, and it'll be a decent space. And now, with 360 tons of stone down and another 100 or so coming tomorrow, we can almost start thinking about getting the raft out. Long days at the moment, working 7-3 and heading straight to the site when I'm done, and spending the whole day here on my days off. But I suppose I can rest when the roof is on it.

Personally I'll be putting in around 60% effort today and having ice lollies for lunch. Anyway, now that it's been decided that really manly men can easily work away in 40° heat, and everyone else is a big girl's blouse, I wonder what will happen next year when we get to 41°, or the year after that... How hot is too hot, for all the rugged, masculine types out there? Mid-60s?

Yeah, loads of them died in the heat and all. What's your point?

I'm fairly sure "we" adjusted our work methods when building "our" empire by working hundreds of thousands of brown, black, or yellow-skinned locals into the ground, when we, delicate white folk as we are, were unaccustomed to the heat, the humidity, the malaria. Are you suggesting people do the same thing now? Can you recommend a temp agency with access to thousands of shackled savages? They all keep hanging up on me when I ask.

Lot of people in this thread who'll never know the simple pleasure of a sachet of instant cappuccino at 3am, brewed with melted snow on a Jetboil, halfway up a mountain, still wrapped in your bivvy bag and down jacket. Best coffee in the world.

They are our trees, and they have more value than another view of the mountain. Nice trees are rare enough out here, nice views aren't. You can pull on your wellies and hop the back fence, in 30 minutes you can be up on top of the mountain. That's a better view to enjoy. There's also a different view 45degrees to the right as well, after the removal of a big ash with dieback, which is less of a shame.

Can't see the base, but cover the grass out to the drip line with a doughnut of brown cardboard, then mushroom compost or seaweed, then rotted woodchip. Give the soil some nutrients.

Windows and doors stripped, ceiling torn down, all scrap metal herded together, bathroom sink removed (to be plumbed in behind the shed, fed from the rainwater tank), patio taken up, roof tiles from the extension on the left taken down. I thought I'd go looking for more spanking porn in the attic. Tore the place apart trying to find it. 170 odd pavers, 190 roof tiles. Floor for the shed, roof for the hen house.

You can't have done, we've never had a flask thread.

Sorry. What should I be eating instead? I get to piss off the flask Nazis as well... curry in a thermos?! Outrageous! For what it's worth, dairy has no place in a thermos flask, milk should be kept separate for those who need it, with the exception of hot chocolate which, ideally, should have its own flask that is never used for tea or coffee. Mick there can get away with leaving the bag in his flask of tea because, as an honorary Frenchman, he only has access to Lipton, and he probably uses the hot tap instead of the kettle to brew it. I have, on occasion, forgotten to take the bag out in the morning and discovered a flask of creosote later in the day, which can turn an already difficult day into an utter disaster. Rooibos, peppermint, herbal teas and the like, are a lot more forgiving and the bag can be left in, and topped up with more water throughout the day if a kettle becomes available.

Having both parts of the punchline is a bit redundant in my opinion, almost tautological, and I prefer the sleek, minimalist approach of just using half of it. But I'm a man of few words, the kind of person who finds it annoying to be asked what should be a yes or no question, but being offered two options instead. Whatever, I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo? One is a little lighter.

Ah, the gloves are mine, I didn't want to damage the pages while having a quick rifle through them. I'll check the dates next time I'm at the site, but that's probably spot on. One of the books has a price tag in Euro though, which would make it a more recent addition to the collection. Ah, I had a quick flick through them, and you know what... there's actually a few too many stories (no photos, illustrations only) about 15/16 year old schoolgirls being spanked by angry nuns to even think about selling them on. I'm fairly sure it'd be illegal. How dare you lower the tone in here with your smutty comments. You'll need half a dozen strokes from the cane by way of penance. Bend over!

I'll have a go if you want mate?

It's been slow progress lately what with the recovery from hand surgery and both me and the wife being in work, but now that she's finished for the summer (a teacher) and can look after the kids, I've got a lot more time to give to the place. I've knocked over the trees that were in the way (including a lovely big bay tree, I'm going to have the digger driver drop the stump somewhere nice, hopefully it'll grow again), taken out all the windows and doors, removed the rotten old wood from the ceilings, all that sort of thing. I had a good look at the roof metal, unfortunately it just isn't worth keeping as it's more rust than metal, so it's all headed for the scrapyard. We've got the digger arriving Monday week to knock it down, pile the stonework up in a corner for future landscaping, level and stone the site, finish the laneway, and start prepping the ground for waste water treatment. Nice for things to be moving, finally. Anyway, I was poking about in the attic, I was looking at salvaging the old water tank and the pipes, and there's an antique water pump up there too that I'll be trying to get running, it's destined for use in my future polytunnels. But what's this, double wrapped in a plastic bag... Oh! Gosh.

Chop down a goat willow, rip it out the ground with a digger, leave the stump upside down in a pile with a load of others for a year, drag it to a patch of boggy ground and set it upright, and it'll grow again. One of mine is, anyway. Other species may vary.

That's the fella.

Why do ducks have tail feathers? To cover their butt quack.

I'm tempted to start trying some of the prusik variations that have a carabiner contained within the knot (there's a few, the names escape me right now), as they are much easier to release after loading. They also work great as the lower prusik on the 3-1 haul system, making it much easier to reset. I like the cut of your jib, if we ever have a spare day for training we might do just that.

Yep, they slip instead of snap, that's partly the appeal of them. They also bite easily again once below the slipping point, unlike some other progress capture devices, which is another big plus point for them.