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Mycoman

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Everything posted by Mycoman

  1. I posted this in a similar thread last year: Traditionally, LR's biggest customer must have been the military (hence the name Defender). Demand has dropped because the armed forces are waaaay smaller than they were and in the type of war/counter insurgency nowadays LRs just don't cut it. So for Land Rover, to put it bluntly, there's too much peace and too much war. Ironic, no?
  2. I do, and cookers make great cider too. Pick them from the ground, rather than the tree, for max sugar content.
  3. First Thatcher dies, then Ferguson retires. Somewhere there is a Scouser with a lamp and one wish left.
  4. Bill Roach, Jim Davidson, Rolf Harris, Freddie Starr and Stuart Hall.. You gotta admit the prison panto is looking good this year....
  5. Two Thai girls asked me if I'd like to go bed with them, they said it would be just like winning the lottery! I agreed, and they were right. We all stripped off and to my horror, we had six matching balls!
  6. Anybody want my collection of 'Chiropracter Monthly'? I've got a load of back issues. I've just been accused of being a plagiarist... ...their words, not mine.
  7. Sad news from the Nestle factory today as a man was crushed to death by hundreds of boxes of chocolate. He tried in vain to attract attention, but every time he yelled 'The Milky Bars are on me!' people just cheered.
  8. "Have you ever seen £20 all crumpled up?". Asked the wife, enigmatically. "No" I said. She gave a sexy smile, reached into her cleavage and pulled out a £20 note. "Have you ever seen £50 all crumpled up?" she asked next. "No" I said. Again, a sexy smile, and she pulled a fifty from her knickers. "Have you ever seen £30,000 all crumpled up?" was the next question. "No" I said, by this time very intrigued. "Well go and look in the garage."
  9. My 3 year old son was watching my wife get changed and asking loads of questions about boobies, what they're for, why women have them, not men, etc - all of which she was happy to respond to, matter of factly. But just in case he went and discussed her breasts at nursery or wherever, she said "but darling, you musn't talk about ladies' bodies with other people, except if you're a doctor or, maybe, a scientist." Long pause, then "Mummy, when I grow up, I want to be a doctor or a scientist." That's ma boy!
  10. Rick Astley asked me if he could borrow my collection of Pixar films. "Okay," I said. "You can have Toy Story, Cars and Finding Nemo but I'm never gonna give you Up."
  11. "If you'd had a tin of shoe polish, you could have blackened her up and got away with it," I said to Oscar Pistorius, laughing. Then I realised that was in bad taste. I mean, why would he have a tin of shoe polish?
  12. Never watch a film without catching Kermode's opinion first.
  13. Marriage is like a deck of cards: to begin with all you need is two hearts and a diamond, you end up looking for a club and a spade....
  14. Mycoman

    Keeping pigs

    We've got 4 Glos Old Spot/Saddleback cross, brought them on from weaners. Share them with another family, thus splitting costs and chores. They are such a joy and so easy to keep but their days are numbered - I know I'll cry like a baby when they go but they will taste delicious and they have had a life most farm animals can only dream of.
  15. I admit, all those scrums are fascinating but pretty special interest - most people prefer incisive back play and a feast of tries, no?
  16. Tell you what, though: who'd have thought Scotland v Italy would be the most entertaining match of the weekend?
  17. Just announced in Leicester - the winner of the 1485 hide-and-seek competition....
  18. I really would urge you: save your back and save the soil! Look up Charles Dowding and no-dig gardening. Plenty mulch, plenty cardboard and let the worms do what they love doing anyway.
  19. A bit of an aside, but a mate of mine, a few years back, did his sports science dissertation on the effect of professionalism on Scottosh rugby. He found that Scotland and Ireland chose exactly the same route, ie districts/provinces controlled from above by the SRU/IRFU and all above remaining amateur clubs. The difference being that for Scotland, it was the end of our 'Golden Generation' (Hastingses, Weir, Jeffrey, Townsend, et al) while for Ireland it was just beginning (B'OD, Wood, et al). Up to that point, under amateurism, these things had been cyclical; post-professionalism, Scotland haven't been able to catch up.
  20. It's Dean Ryan in the coaching set-up - would love to see Dean Richards, mind, he'd get the best out of what is, on paper, a decent scrum (though wasn't he the coach involved in the 'bloodgate' scandal I referred to?). If the 6N did become all 'new' countries, wouldn't that be a case of the cream rising to the top? Who benefits from keeping these countries down? And as for the Calcutta Cup - probably 1990 was the last genuinely competitive example of the fixture (OK then, 1994, Rob Andrew's hands in the ruck... ...bitter, me?). When we've won since it's been a stinker of a game. Clinging on to the way things have always been is what, in my opinion, holds rugby back.
  21. Was a comment on the asparagus-stinky-wee-wee topic.
  22. Cracking 1st round of matches, more to come then Lions in the summer! I think rugby lost all moral high ground after that affair a couple of years back with the guy smuggling a joke shop blood capsule in his sock! I enjoy watching top rugby union but the trouble is it's all too much of a closed shop, too cosy. I really want to see a second tier 6 Nations, with countries like Georgia, Romania, Portugal, etc. and promotion/relegation between. And yes, that means Scotland would most likely end up going down but how refreshing for us to have the chance to win a few games and to get the opportunity to travel to Lisbon, Bucharest, the capital of Georgia(?), etc, and it would surely broaden the sport's appeal internationally.
  23. My neighbours and I have done a couple of seasons of 'no-dig' gardening - them with more success than me (they don't have nippers). But i did get some great broad beans, they didn't even make it back to the kitchen. No-dig is way easier than traditional gardening and it keeps the soil ecosystem intact. A good place to find out more is: www.charlesdowding.co.uk | No dig gardening I've got this book, well worth a read: Organic Gardening: The Natural No-dig Way:Amazon:Books
  24. Oh, and always have a soft spot for Queen of the South (both parents from Dumfries area): the only team named in the Bible (Matthew 12:42) - specifically named, before Bury or Reading fans pipe up....

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