Mike Dempsey

I have a blackberry and use a chip and pin reader supplied by Worldpay. I have downloaded an app from the Worldpay website. There is no monthly merchant fees and you only pay a small charge for each transaction. There is also no monthly charge for the chip and pin reader. Havent used it yet as most people want to pay me cash or by bacs. Not complaining though as it is an option for customers.

I havent used my 066 for a couple of years and want to use it tomorrow for milling up some oak. I think I probably didnt run it dry and the residual petrol has possibly evaporated. What is the best way to start it up again without wrecking it? Should I just put in new petrol and fire it up or is there a better way to do it. I have a heavy duty filter and I have stripped it down and washed relevant parts. Any help will be appreciated. Mike

Since I am up in Bonny Scotland if we job share the Chancellor's job, in my spare time I could run Scotland.

I can count up to about 30 or so but I have a calculator to help me beyond that. Can I be your Chancellor of the Exchequer or would you consider me over-qualified for the job? Mike

Jimmy Should be there now. Mike

Hi Jimmy I have pm'd you. Mike Dempsey

I used to work from home in a large shed in the garden. When I got my heating upgraded I got a radiator installed which is absolutely brilliant. As I have also got leccy in as well I claim for gas and leccy. If I remember correctly it is about 20% of both bills I claim for. I also claim for any maintenance for the shed which needs done. If you use part of your house ie room or garage I think it may have to be exclusively for that purpose. You can claim part of your mortgage as an expense for the business if you use it exclusively for your business. The down side of that though is you may be liable for business rates and paying partial capital gains tax. I also claim for half of my internet connection and landline and all my computer expenses. Years ago I did a marketing course and there was an accountant on it who gave me a big list of things I could offset against the business. My eyes nearly popped as he kept adding things to the list. Best bit was though it was a freeby so, not all financial people are wa**ers, just most of them!

As a special offer for Arbtalk members I am doing wooden business cards for 40p each plus vat instead of the 50p each. A sample of my own one can be seen below or you can check out the website at home page You can pm me oremail me on [email protected] or call me on 07769703520 Mike Dempsey Pens of Distinction

Heading up to Glenshee in a few weeks time when there is enough snow. Its only an hour and a half away so I can go midweek when there are smaller queues. One of the benefits of being self employed.Ocassionally go to Aonoch Mor which is about 2 hours away.

According to a recent scientifc study, women will fnd different males attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle. When a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features. However, just before she is menstruating she will prefer a man doused in petrol and set on fire with scissors stuck in his eyes and a cricket bat shoved up his arse.

The Pope and Margaret Thatcher are sharing a balcony in front of a huge crowd. The ex-PM and His Holiness have seen it all before, so to make it a bit more interesting, Maggie says to the Pope, “Did you know that with just one little wave of my hand, I can make every Conservative in the crowd go wild?” He doubts it, so she shows him. Sure enough, the wave is greeted with wild cheering from the Tories. Gradually, the noise subsides. “That was impressive,” says the Pope, “but did you know that, with just one little nod, I can make every person in the crowd go crazy with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts and they will forever speak of this day and rejoice.” The Iron Lady seriously doubts this and says, “One nod and all people will rejoice forever? Show me.” So the Pope head-butts her.

A magician was working on a cruise ship. As there was a completely new audience every couple of weeks, he was able to get away with the same routine over and over again. The only problem was that the ship’s captain had a parrot that saw the shows each week and began to understand and memorize how the magician did every trick. After a while the parrot started to shout out in the middle of the show, “Look, he’s got a card up his sleeve”, or “Look, he’s hiding something under his hat” or “Why is it always the queen of clubs?” The magician wanted to kill the parrot but wasn’t in a position to do anything – after all, it belonged to the ship’s captain. One evening, however, in the middle of his show there was a freak storm and the ship sank. The magician found himself foating on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot. For a couple of days they glared at each other, but did not share a single word. This went on for three days, then four. Finally on the fifth day, the parrot said, “Okay, I give up. Where’s the ******* ship?”

just milled up a couple of yew logs today, one of them was nice and pippy. Got a mate coming around in a few days to buy some planks for converting into woodturning blanks. Apart from that trying to avoid arguments with the wife and the best way to do that is to go out the house to the workshop. It is long overdue a tidy up and that will keep me busy for 2 or 3 days. I find the Christmas and new year holidays a real drag. I have also got to design and build a prototype of a baby's cot which converts into a maternity chair for feeding the baby in. I think its going to be pretty complex and I can feel a lot of swearing coming on even as I sit at my computer. A part of me wishes that I never agreed to take on the project but as I said yes I will just have to crack on.

When I am milling up logs I always take a hand brush with me a sweep away any sawdust, shavings etc from the petrol tank filler. Doesnt take long but it does help prevent really fine crap ending up in the carb and having to strip it down and clean it. I do strip it down about once a year or so anyway to clean it out. Just good habits I suppose.

Although I am not a tree surgeon and I mill logs for making furniture from I was once FSC certified. The paperwork was horrendous and the goalposts were changed regularly. I was only using windblown trees and FSC made it so difficult to use this kind of timber I gave it up. It didnt affect my business at all. I think my standards are higher than FSC's are and I am not going to change that. I am toying with the ISO 14001 environmental standards though. There is a company local to me who do this accreditation and I think I will be contacting them in the new year for a quote. My private customers wont care whether I am certified or not but a lot of my business customers ask these kind of questions and it could open a few more doors for the business.

Thats an excellent method to use a lovely piece of burr elm economically. Worth all the effort in my opinion. Mike

In my business premises I use a 8kw stove to heat it. Its about 1000 square feet with a single skin roof. I am going to buy a 20kw later on in the year. I can burn all my sawdust and offcuts as well as logs so I save on landfill costs of about £600 a year. Just about talked the missus into a woodburning stove in the house.Our gas bill in a 3 bedroom end terraced house with double glazing and cavity wall insulation is mental, about 1200 a year. My wife has arthritis and feels the cold very easy and then her joints start to ache. At present we have a condensing boiler system. I dont intend to link it in to the gas boiler so it will still be used for the hot water and maybe for an hour first thing in the morning.

You are probably meaning Ecofans. Widely available but dont get on ebay as good chance it will be a fake. Real ones are made in Canada I think

Hi Peter Im in Glenrothes and dont have a problem in getting firewood. Its all about developing long term contacts. I have been milling trees with an Alaskan Mill for about 12 years now and people now phone me up with requests for me to take away trees for milling and when I get there if they are too small they are firewood. Any branches on bigger logs are also firewood. I also do all the tree work for my landlord so I get paid to get my own firewood. Me and a mate also act very professionally and responsibly. We dont leave a mess, we are tidy, and polite to enquiring members of the public, barrier tapes and signs are put up if near the public etc. You get the message. This is the total opposite to large nos of the public who I have seen running about Glenrothes in the last couple of years with chainsaws and vans cutting trees up for firewood. Often badly parked on bends in the road, no safety gear, B&Q chainsaw, their kids helping and getting in the way and nearly being killed in the processs, no training or qualifications or insurance. The police in Fife are starting to arrest these kind of people for theft of the wood as this is the only way they can possibly prevent serious injury or even death. Sorry I cant be much help in giving you any locations where you could help yourself to free wood but as it has taken me about 15 years to develop good relationships with local landowners to the point I can go and help myself when I want to, I am not going to lose that privilidge. Mike

Well this afternoon 5 of them were on overtime to get the job finished. Normally finish a 1pm but they were there till 4.30!

Just passed the local council tree squad a couple of days ago chipping up a few branches in the primary school next to my house. There were seven of them operating it (or rather standing around it). It has taken them a full week to trim a few branches of some trees in the grounds and so far about 4 days to chip them. Is this a record for the most expensive job that one man, a saw and chipper could do in an afternoon or if he slowed down a bit, stretched it out to a full day?

Steve they are 50p each plus vat. How about if I do a special offer for Arbtalk members, say at 40p each plus the vat, possibly up to end of January. I cant remember if there is going to be a Christmas raffle or not but if there is I will offer 50 for a prize (will check this out shortly) Mike

:001_smile:Check out the shop Steve

I think when I get time I will cut out some images to take away the background. Thanks Steve. To the others who have commented about the lack of pens, I started the business making wooden barrelled pens and laser engraving them and the wooden boxes. The pens are now a very small part of the business and I have been thinking about changing the business name now for a while. The trouble is that there are several thousand wooden business cards out there with the company name on them and it could be a major exercise in rebranding the company. I will have to give it some serious thoughts. I just wish I had the budget that Royal Mail had when they changed their name to Consignia and then back again. Anyway thanks for all the comments and to the god folk of Arbtalk who have liked my fb page. Mike

Sorry Steve, I dont get it. What's the difference between the two pictures. Mike