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Arborists Comandments


Mark T
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Thine customer is NEVER correct on matters of arboriculture, but to confuse their mind to convince them they had the correct answer/solution is acceptable and may reap great reward!

Thou shalt not swear from the top of a tree at the top of your voice no matter how much its the trees fault.

 

One must swear in Latin only, when it is the trees fault.

 

Te futueo et caballum tuum !!!!!!!

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thou shall always cut off any naughty branches that drive climber mad, and explain to customer it is crown restoration.

thy groundy should never ever touchy blower until ALL lifting and raking is dunneth

Thy groundy should never send up noisy cutty tool without checking that it doesnt need drinky drinky first

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thou shall always cut off any naughty branches that drive climber mad, and explain to customer it is crown restoration.

thy groundy should never ever touchy blower until ALL lifting and raking is dunneth

Thy groundy should never send up noisy cutty tool without checking that it doesnt need drinky drinky first

 

Universal truths brother. Is it really the same everywhere?

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Thou will not blow little pile of customers dead husbands ashes all over garden.(whoopps)

 

Thou will take the Pi** out of copper for trying to give groundie a ticket for no driving license whilst sat in right seat of left hand drive mog.(best 10 mins of fun ever).

 

The wife will accept that PPE has more right to be in the washer than her smalls.It paid for the thing and the thong in the first place.Same rule applies to sawdust on carpet, mud and woodchip on drive and urgent chiansaw repairs on kitchen table.

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