Practical Jokes

[Christopher Schroeter]

I used to drive a tarmac wagon and before I was there they took delivery of a new Hot Box wagon, which consist of a big hopper with a screw at the bottom which drives the tarmac to a shoot at the back. One of the dirty lads got in the hopper and had a crap! The bosses came out to inspect their new toy, pressed the button that operated the screw and lo and behold a turd dropped out at their feet!

[Craobh]

I used to drive a tarmac wagon and before I was there they took delivery of a new Hot Box wagon, which consist of a big hopper with a screw at the bottom which drives the tarmac to a shoot at the back. One of the dirty lads got in the hopper and had a crap! The bosses came out to inspect their new toy, pressed the button that operated the screw and lo and behold a turd dropped out at their feet!

 

Ok Ok who didn't do the toilet training safety briefing lol

[Grass hopper]

Working in a very well to do customers garden cleaning up some branches , the boss went off to dump chips , the customer came out and asked me to remove a tree in the lawn , when the boss came back after a bit he said to me were is the tree gone when I told him he had as me to remove it well he went mad , it was going to cost him the job the customer came out and said to him It was very nice of your lad to remove the tree for me.

[ratcatcher]

been sent for a sky hook, a left handed axe, a stump greaser oh and to look for the guy who'll give me the long stand

 

 

pretty lame I guess but the old ones do seem to work lol

 

working in a builder merchants as a youngster, we had a younger lad come in asking for a "long weight" (I was clued up on the gag, being told that the weight was for sash windows) they kept him there for a good 45 minutes, before giving him an 18" sash weight, with the instructions to tell his boss, that if that wait was not long enough, send him back for a longer one:laugh1: he came back a little later and was given a good hour, the old ones are the best

 

my initiation to the job though involved grease, sawdust and the nether regions, by the firms female secretary:blushing:

[Al Baker]

Double vodkas in their beers when buying rounds with hardened drinker.

They don't taste it.

They dont seem to be able to handle their beer as well as usual.

[Mr. Squirrel]

Spam and mayonnaise in a mates bicycle seat tube, that was a good one. Stank. He actually bought a new bike, though he won't confirm whether that was due to the mysterious smell...

Mouse trap on the top locker shelf has worked a few times.

A hand full of leaves in anybodys throw cube is good once in a while too.

[steve@black]

Worked for ma company on line work in the early nineties and one fo the lads took a crap in anothers lunch box.What I recently found out was the lad whos lunch box it was then spent the next few months pissing in the blokes flask.

[Sniffy]

Sent a newbie for a fluorescent phalopian tube . The woman behind the counter wasn't to happy !