Very brave man jokes

[PeteB]

How do you turn a fox into an elephant?

Marry it!

 

Why is the space between a womans breasts and hips called a waist?

Because you could easily fit another pair of tits there!

 

Why do women fake orgasms?

Because they think men care!

 

Why do men pass more gas than women?

Because women can't shut up long enough to build up th required pressure!

 

Women will never be equal to men.......

until they can walk down the street with a beer gut and a bald head and still think they are sexy!

[Joe]

what do you do if you see a woman crossing a road?

better question, whet the hell's she doing out the kitchen??!!

[Robert_S]

why are womens feet smaller than mens?

 

so they can get closer to the cooker.

[TimberCutterDartmoor]

Why shouldn't women wear watches?

 

Because there's a clock on the cooker.

[PeteB]

Scientists have discovered the food type that diminishes womens sex drive by 90%.................

Its called wedding cake!

 

What are the three fastest forms of communication

1. Television

2. Telephone

3. Telawomen

 

 

Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?

Because they don't have any balls to scratch!

Edited October 5, 2009 by PeteB
spelling

[Simon Rotheram]

My wife came into the living room and asked whats on the tv?

 

"dust!" I replied!

[Lyn Ed]

whats the fatty tissue around the clitoris called?

The wife.

[Simon Rotheram]

clitoris

 

Do they really exist?

[TheTreeWiseMen]

How many men does it take to open a beer?

 

 

 

 

None! It should be open when she brings it to you.

[Tommy_B]

Husband and Wife have been married for 15 years and the guy always insists that they have sex with the lights turned off and the curtains shut tight. His wife has always wondered why and decides to catch him out. The next time they are getting it on, she leans over and turns on the light and catches him with a sex toy in his hand.

 

The wife hits the roof and screams "What the hell do you think you're playing at?!? Explain yourself!!!"

 

The bloke looks up and says "I'll explain this if you can explain the kids...."