Arborists Comandments

[stoxs]

thou shan`t call pretty girly in roll shop Camel Toe because she wears tight trousers.

[skyhuck]

Thy will not tell thy subbie, who is having a fag, that the pit bull type dog that attacked him earlier, is approaching. Thy will stay in thy mog with thy groundie, pissing thy selfs with laughter as it approaches from the rear of thy mog where he cannot see.

[Stephen Blair]

Thine team shall learn different roles and sing the songs from the Jungle Book to aid passage of miserable jobs

 

i think i will take on some staff just to try that out, working yourself is less hassle but so boring and no laughs.

 

Thy heardith once aboutith a groundie that left the site to go for a dump, after returning over 2 hrs later, said boss asked where the bleep had you been.The chap replied, i asked the lady along the road if i could use her loo, she replied certainly make yourelf at home.

So why have you been over 2 hrs asked the boss

The gentle giant groundsman replied " i had a bath"

 

So thou shall never wash the baws in nieghbours bathroom with lufa:001_tongue:

[Stephen Blair]

thou shall always consult the "minge ometer" before entering the roll shop

[Frank]

Thou must always proclaim to the Police constable that you actually believed you were the "5th emergency service", so could pretty much do what you liked.

[Stephen Blair]

thou loved the time he convinced the town lad that pheasants were viscious and wouldnt come back in the garden

[skyhuck]

Thou shall buy a mog, after the AA send thy a letter saying if you call them again to pull thy LDV of the grass thy shall be sent a bill.

[Stephen Blair]

thou shall own a mog or be a big girly blousy

[Stephen Blair]

thou shall recieve one free landrover with every halfords tool box

[Frank]

thou shalt not laugh when feathers fly out of the chipper chute.