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Lawn sausages


Jon Lad
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i had a job that i walked off without being paid for the time i spent there as the owner had said she would clear up all the dog eggs off the lawn, which granted she did but straight into the flowerbeds where i was supposed to be working. I didn't know what to say or do so i rang the Oracle (Mr Lofthouse) for his sage advice which was dog egg tax or walk, i took the latter option after cleaning my boots and tools under her patio tap.

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when i was a lad i used to work for a local landscaper,who done contract grass cutting,for schools ,pubs ,etc,one day we were working at a pub striming and the grass was quite long ,where the boss went stright through a babys nappie ,that was with me for quite some time !errrr!

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I had a 'nice' experience only yesterday, doing some leaf clearance work in some borders with my blower/vac, before i had chance to avoid it i was sucking up and mulching cat sh@t, the smell hit me like a brick! and when you hav'nt got time to strip your machine down for a clean it continues hitting you like a brick!! Having said that i think the worst is when you can smell it in the van, you've got the blowers on warm and that fruity shitty unmistakable stink fills the cab, naturally you look down and there it is, a great big ginger wedge of dog shite right on the clutch pedal! aaaaaaaarrrrgh!

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