Edmond Dantes

That's all I ever do. I wonder how much time is wasted in the industry by people setting up over-elaborate climbing systems? Can they really make that much of a difference? It's not the bloody olympics, shaving a few seconds off here and there. Spend 5 minutes setting up something that saves you a teeny bit of effort and 2 minutes on the climb. Save your cash and buy the missus some flowers with a card saying "I'm going to stop being a total tree bore".

You're making me out to be some kind of trigger happy fool - I'm not. Think whatever you want man, but like it or not stuff happens beyond your control that you just have to accept.

I meant accidental swing from a long open branch walk. I agree with Will. Little can go wrong, but don't think for a minute it's impossible.

Strictly speaking that's not true. Just because you have a rope and harness on doesn't mean 'you will never fall'. People do fall and it is dangerous. A long swing can break your neck, a seemingly sound branch which you choose to anchor onto could have serious rot which isn't evident from below. There are any number of things which can go badly wrong, it pays to be cautious, at least when starting out. When you've been doing it longer, you just accept there are risks and you just have to get on with it because that's the job! Saying bluntly - you will never fall, it is impossible - is a bit daft.

They do it because everything on the outside of a wagon is filthy, and it saves getting black hands if you're about to eat your lunch or get back in your clean cab (provided they have a clean cab in the first place of course). Personally I don't climb in gloves unless it's super cold, but they do go on as soon as I touch down for one reason only. Dog s**t.

So you're one of those 'holier than thou' climbers who comes down and kicks back? Too good to drag are you?

Don't forget field maples. I go at them in a positive frame of mind, thinking, ' this one will be different'. About five minutes in and my hair is well and truly off.

There is a pine up on the Downs in Bristol by the uni residential halls with about four bags in it, very high. I know the guys who did it and they just gave up and went to the next job! That was about 3 years ago - bags are still there.

Does this mean you'd be climbing with your main line PLUS a 15-20m second line?!! I get tangled enough with a 5m strop, let alone 15m! As other people said you should be able to do most things with a short side strop, using a second longer line only when those limbs get really long and spindly. Whatever you use to get out there, make sure you're roped in twice before you use your top handle.

I know where they are and it is not only a very busy road but pensioner city so I can imagine them walking straight onto the site! Due to come down really, too big for the location.

I've had to knock on someone's door and lie to them about having a bad cold to get bog roll so I could go and have a nature poo in the field next door cos I got caught short. (There was no question of using their loo before you say it). ALWAYS CARRY BUMWAD and a shovel.

I think the comment about clipping the strop to the chain brake is right, but also you could just try not slinging it about so much - it takes no time to clip it on between cuts. We haven't broken one so long as I can remember for over three years. I always wince when I watch a few hundred quid going a' swinging off someone's belt.

We do the funky chicken when you want a rake. Nobody knows why, we've just always done it.

I have - and it was housing association too. Public open space though, so no one noticed. Come on all you guys getting heated about this, mistakes happen and that's the way it is. If apologies were made and mistakes rectified, then that is all that can be done. There is more to life than trees - no one died - calm down. p.s. All you guys that hint at insulting each other, then apologise and pretend you meant it differently, you need to grow a pair.

Came home and found a bread stick on the floor. Seems to be only interested in the grain of rice next to it though.