school 1957-2010

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Scenario:

Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

 

1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.

 

2010 - Police called, arrests Johnny and Mark.. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it. Both children go to anger management programs for 3 months. School board hold meeting to implement bullying prevention programmes

 

Scenario:

Robbie won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

 

1957 - Robbie sent to office and given 6 of the best by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

 

2010 - Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADHD. Robbie's parents get fortnightly disability payments and School gets extra funding from government because Robbie has a disability.

 

Scenario :

Billy breaks a window in his neighbour's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

 

1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

 

2010 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison.

 

Scenario :

Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

 

1957 - Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with.

 

2010 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

 

 

Scenario :

Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from Guy Fawkes, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a bull ant nest.

 

1957 - Ants die.

 

2010- Police & Anti-Terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated. Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

 

Scenario :

Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary . Mary hugs him to comfort him.

 

1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

 

2010 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.

[Bomag]

So very true.

[tommer9]

Too true Ade. Poingnant post.

[PeteB]

So right with this one,

 

We all witness stuff like this every day yet we do nought about it!

[Stephen Blair]

The peolple who make the desicions now are the kids from 1957, so what does that say about the above?

[Robert_S]

im sure you could link it the other way as well:

 

1957 johnny wakes up with ice on the inside of the window and nowt to eat

 

2010 johnny wakes up with a spring in his step the heating has come on an hour before he woke and there is plenty to eat.

 

Every one wants to hanker back to the good old days but they only see them through selective vision, 1957 AND 2010 have good and bad points.

[Wolfie]

good one ade, have you seen this one - Health and safety at battle of waterloo.

 

Nelson - Admiral of the Fleet

Hardy - his loyal mate

 

 

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."

Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."

 

Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to the signal officer. What's the meaning of this?"

Hardy: "Sorry sir?"

 

Nelson (reading aloud): "England expects every person to do his duty, regardless of race, gender sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability". "What gobbledygook is this?"

 

Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'England' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."

 

Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."

Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have been designated smoke-free working environments."

 

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the main brace to steel the men before battle."

 

Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."

 

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it ...full speed ahead."

Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed Limit in this stretch of water."

 

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle In history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest please."

 

Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."

 

Nelson: "What?"

Hardy: "Health and safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No harness. And they said that rope ladder doesn't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until proper scaffolding can be erected."

 

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."

Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair accessto the fo'c'sle Admiral."

 

Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."

Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free environment for the differently abled."

 

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of admiral by playing the disability card."

 

Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under- represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

 

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."

Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt-haven't you seen the adverts?"

 

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."

 

Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."

 

Nelson: "What? This is mutiny."

 

Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There are a couple of legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

 

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"

Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."

 

Nelson: "We're not?"

Hardy: "No, sir. The Frenchies and the Spanish are our European partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, We shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."

 

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."

Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity co-ordinator Hear you saying that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary."

 

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy, who speaks ill of your King."

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your life"

 

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum, sodomy and the lash?"

Hardy: As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."

 

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"

Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."

 

Nelson: "In that case ...kiss me, Hardy.

[TimberCutterDartmoor]

So so true.