Tales from tree work

[Andy Collins]

Do you have in interesting tale to tell of your days in tree work? A funny incident, a job that went wrong, a clash with authority?

A company I used to work for (before my time) had a job removing large trees on an air base (back before all the H&S stuff), and the trees had to be moved out of the base along a main runway. The boss and his right hand man were felling, and my old chap was tasked with the job of extraction with the big Fiat tractor and Hydrotongs. All was going swimmingly well, tree after tree felled and extracted smoothly, with my dad trundling the trees out. Then there is the sound of multiple sirens wailing above the saws. Down on the runway, one Fiat tractor is happily trundling along with its cargo in tow at 6mph, driver oblivious to the fact that a Hercules transporter is circling to land, so the forces security is racing up the runway, sirens blaring, shouting through loud hailers to "Get off the bloody runway!!" But with ear defenders down, and the Fiat tugging the large trees on full power, the old chap couldnt hear what all the fuss was about, until they pulled across in front of him and explained the desperation of the situation.

[garth mc garth]

ha ha sounds familiar, a few years ago we were clearing vegetation for the installation of a new car park at a small kent airport. we were told by air traffic control that all planes landed from the same direction ie furthest away from us and that they would notify us of any incoming air traffic by the cb's in our machinery. we were forwarding the timber across the end of the runway all day without hassle until the owner of the airport decideds to land his small private plane at the end we were working, so imagine his and our surprise to see 2 large tractors and a sodding great loading shovel in the middle of his flight path. We all ducked for some reason (as if it would make any difference) and his landing gear passed within a few feet of our heads.

Needless to say we all went upto the control tower and had a go at them for not telling us he was landing and allowing us to cross in front.

[Frankie Lawrence]

Haha your two stories are great.

 

last June during the mega mega hot period we were on a mass clearance job at a regularly done natiional trust site, lots of big ashes felled lots of hand balling extraction lots of burning brash in 25 degree heat.

 

Not long had this bloke on 35 ish years old reckoned hed had a massive job in farming or something, and the week before this prticular day he said On site 'I cant take this heat can you take me to the yard I want to go home' Ok mate your self employed its your monney etc'

 

Then a week later A trust warden asked him very nicely to move his car from under an oak or something and that was it he went no goodbye no phone call just couldnt handle it me and a blokes were sweating our tits off and relised hed been gone a while.

 

About 2 months later he had the cheek to phone back and ask for work!

[PeteB]

Had a large Oak to fell on the outskirts of Leicester and we were having the timber for firewood. Gobbed it and it came over nicely - then reared up on some limbs so that the butt end was about waist height off the floor. Bonus! reversed the Transit under it and cut off the first length so that it was as wide as the truck and about 4 foot high. Chocked it and sent the driver back to the yard - when he returned, the rear lights wer all bust about. As he rolled the butt off over the rear, the truck reared up wheelie style and smashed the rear into the yard surface, then slammed the front down with a fair whack without doing any further damage. I reckon the lump weighed about 2000kgs!

[David oakman]

Nice thread Andy i have had a good chuckle there will be some good tales on here i am sure:thumbup1:

[defenderjack]

not quite as impressive as nearly being decapatated by an aircraft but i remember being in the woods felling some pines when one of the guys shouted over that he wasnt feeling to hot and was gona have to toddle off in the woods to empty himself ,"lovely we all thought" about 15 minutes later he comes back looking a bit sheepish and explained that halfway through his call of nature 2 horse riders rode up through the trees on a footpath he never saw and caught him perched up against a tree with his kacks round his ankles " , in fits of giggles i said to him "well what did you do " he said "well what else could i do !!! i put my visor down and pretended they couldnt see me!" lol:thumbup1: i guess you had to be there but every time i think of it i have a little chuckle .

[Frankie Lawrence]

not quite as impressive as nearly being decapatated by an aircraft but i remember being in the woods felling some pines when one of the guys shouted over that he wasnt feeling to hot and was gona have to toddle off in the woods to empty himself ,"lovely we all thought" about 15 minutes later he comes back looking a bit sheepish and explained that halfway through his call of nature 2 horse riders rode up through the trees on a footpath he never saw and caught him perched up against a tree with his kacks round his ankles " , in fits of giggles i said to him "well what did you do " he said "well what else could i do !!! i put my visor down and pretended they couldnt see me!" lol:thumbup1: i guess you had to be there but every time i think of it i have a little chuckle .

 

Brilliant im sure ive heard this story almost identicall before.

 

Should be a good thread.

[Danavan]

Heard a story, one of pleanty second hand from the people who made this job what it is to me now..

 

It starts with a couple of crews on a long tearm job (over 2 days) on a posh estate pruning & felling trees.

Fires on site for a day or two with resulting embers bing the bed for the next days fry up as is the norm.

On a day near the end of the contract the van in front hits a muntjack deer! Crew behind stop & finish off the job (would have been poching otherwise;)!)

Said deer is taken to site & newbee on the site is instructed to gut, skin, construct a spit & cook the feast for consumption later that day..

All is going well & the crews are looking fwd to a meal of fresh deer when the guv turns up in not the happy of moods!

'What the FU** is going on hear! I just had Mrs ?? on the phone in tears telling me to get down hear & to remove the savages I employ from their land!'

'Why?'

'The animals are cooking a DOG! on my bloody lawn!!'

[Jon Lad]

A friend of mine was doing some powerline work quite a few years ago. This was back in the day when lets say it wasn't as essential for you to have all the right tickets to be working.

He was climbing a tree to be drawn back from the wires, there were two other lads nearby felling some spruce which were growing too close to the wires as well.

At the same time two contractors were up a pole just next to where they were working, doing some work to the cross member at the top of the pole.

One of the two lads felling the spruces, just stuck a back cut into one of the trees that was to come out - no gob or even a step cut and it fell the wrong way and the top of the tree landed on the wires, before bouncing and sliding off them.

One of the pole lads shouted down "What the f****** hell are you doing! A bloody tree surgeon shouldn't fell a tree like that!"

To which the lad who'd done it replied "Well I'm not a tree surgeon, I'm a baker".

[David oakman]

A few years back i had contractors in the park felling a few big old oaks they have a big Volvo BM and piled all the wood for a big fire this was in july after the deer have had their young. They came in one morning and lit the fire then i got a call David you better get here quick the embers from the fire had landed in an old hollow oak and caught alight in the dead wood as the fire in the tree raged flames were coming out of the top of the tree. We had to just wait till it burnt out but i had a restless night i was afraid it would blow to the next tree.

 

PS all veteran lovers please forgive me:lol: