Why I hate feminism

[Toad]

On 23/06/2018 at 14:43, MattyF said:

The concept of feminism I wholly agree with, I really do and think it’s a great quality for a woman to have.

 

I agree. A bit of reading, learning and consideration of privilege in today's society is well worthwhile.

[forestboy1978]

37 minutes ago, Toad said:

I agree. A bit of reading, learning and consideration of privilege in today's society is well worthwhile.

How about you put your money where your mouth is and explain, precisely, where the privilege is being a man?

 

Last time I looked we get off the sinking ship last and we are conscripted during war times etc. etc. 

 

Don't get me wrong my fiancée is precious to me and I make a point of seeing she experiences little to no hardship and that's the way it should be IMO but she appreciates I am a man and I am willing to suffer for her comfort. How will modern day feminism improve her lot?

[tree-fancier123]

52 minutes ago, forestboy1978 said:

she appreciates I am a man and I am willing to suffer for her comfort

what do you think about men leave women with one or two young kids and go off to start another family?

Some men don't seem to think they need to be responsible just because they have become a father.

Of course some women will have affairs after having a young family and leave the poor heartbroken husband who so wanted his family to stay together. Maybe they should make a law parents have to stay together until the kids are all 16 or they forfeit 50% of their disposable income to the state - to be enforced by armoured car.

I agree women aren't rushing to get down the coal mines, and that is a problem.

[janey]

I've been umming and ahhing about commenting on this thread as it's a huge topic and covers so much more than the point raised in the original post. 

 

Modern, media based, virtue signalling, #metoo feminism is something to be ashamed of and is not what women have fought so strongly for and even died for. IMO. If women now want equality, then that should mean exactly that - no more ridiculous gender quotas or women only groups. We should accept being judged on our merits as a person and not given special treatment simply because of the chance mingling of our parents dna or our subsequent lifestyle choices. I believe that true feminism is being able to have the CHOICE in what we do in life, whether that's as a stay at home mum or being the CEO of a multi billion pound business. 

 

What I've seen more of recently is the objectification and belittlement of males in a totally hypocritical way and that the irony of this goes way over the heads of most wimmin doing this. And what so many so called modern feminists refuse to accept that with the priveledge of choice they then need to accept the responsibilities and consequences of their actions. Take going out and getting ratarsed for example - if you're going to wear provocative clothing and put yourself in a vulnerable position which thanks to changing attitudes we can now do, then, although it should NEVER happen, you shouldn't be surprised if you end up being a victim. 

 

Arb is still a very male dominated industry and that's absolutely fine. Women now have so many choices in what they can do in life and encouragement to be whatever they want. If they don't want to be an arborist or Tree Officer then that's fine too as it's their choice to make and no amount of gender quotas will (or should!) change that. I've worked with some bloody amazing people over my career, men and women, and I have only encountered discrimination from one individual: that was because of their personality and NOT because of my gender. I like to have an un PC banter and I like to have a hug from my colleagues without there being any hysterical recriminations about inappropriate behaviour. I'm intelligent enough to know what's just good natured messing around and robust enough to deal with anything more sinister if the need arises without resorting to being a princess about it. 

 

That's my tuppence worth, anyway. 

Edited June 25, 2018 by janey
Spelling

[Toad]

7 hours ago, forestboy1978 said:

How about you put your money where your mouth is and explain, precisely, where the privilege is being a man?

 

Last time I looked we get off the sinking ship last and we are conscripted during war times etc. etc. 

 

Don't get me wrong my fiancée is precious to me and I make a point of seeing she experiences little to no hardship and that's the way it should be IMO but she appreciates I am a man and I am willing to suffer for her comfort. How will modern day feminism improve her lot?

I can give some examples for you, I'm sure after reading plenty of comments in this thread there will be a lot of people who disagree though.

 

Men, in particular white straight men, have been in a position of power in this country pretty much for the entire time it's been industrialised. For many years women didn't have jobs in any sort of position of power or responsibility. Consider your grandparents, and this parents, when your grandmother's and their mothers were at school, what options did they have? Were they offered further education, apprenticeships or the like? Did they have the same expectations that they could go out and become successful in a variety of different fields? The fact that women these days have more options is great, but it's only a recent development. While we, as men, have male role models going back hundreds of years in company director or owner positions, there are far fewer for women, the expectation and culture for the careers and development of women is still light years behind that of men. Of cousee, there have been some examples of successes, but far fewer than men.

 

The excuses about women not having to go to war? Why didn't they? Because men said they couldn't be in the army.

 

Using an example related to this topic a little better, how often have you had to worry about sexual assault in a night out? Have ever had a concern that a woman might have slipped something in your drink? Have you ever been excited to hear about new date rape drug testing kits you can take in a night out? When you do go for drinks, do you have to walk home with a friend to make sure you feel safe in case you are approached by a gang of drinks, or a rapist? I've never ever had to consider that as a man, and yet all my female friends have had to. That right there is a privilege. If you can't see that one example, then you are deluded.

[Yournamehere]

22 minutes ago, janey said:

<snip>...Take going out and getting ratarsed for example - if you're going to wear provocative clothing and put yourself in a vulnerable position which thanks to changing attitudes we can now do, then, although it should NEVER happen, you shouldn't be surprised if you end up being a victim. 

 

<snip>

Aah! I see.

So if your up a tree dangling on a rope, and someone just can't resist shimmying up the tree after you, and cutting the rope, to watch you fall and break your neck; just for the shigs like: then it's your fault for climbing a tree with a rope and being provocative.

Thanks.

I get that now.

[janey]

@Yournamehere I don't understand your point. All I was trying to say in the bit of my post that you've quoted is that we are all so lucky now to have the opportunity to do whatever we want in life but that we all need to accept a level of self responsibility. 

[Yournamehere]

17 minutes ago, janey said:

@Yournamehere I don't understand your point. All I was trying to say in the bit of my post that you've quoted is that we are all so lucky now to have the opportunity to do whatever we want in life but that we all need to accept a level of self responsibility. 

Just in case, presumably, a man comes along who is unable to control himself.

[janey]

9 minutes ago, Yournamehere said:

Just in case, presumably, a man comes along who is unable to control himself.

Oh that's a given around me, obviously ???. And who says that it has to be a man,  huh? ?

Edited June 25, 2018 by janey

[Yournamehere]

28 minutes ago, Yournamehere said:

Aah! I see.

So if your up a tree dangling on a rope, and someone just can't resist shimmying up the tree after you, and cutting the rope, to watch you fall and break your neck; just for the shigs like: then it's your fault for climbing a tree with a rope and being provocative.

Thanks.

I get that now.

re the sad and confused react to this.

It's an analogy.

A second example couched in familiar terms to make the underlying general point easier to understand.

A man being provoked beyond endurance to attack a girl in a short skirt walking alone at night and then blaming the girl is here compared to someone thinking it fun to watch someone fall and blaming the climber, by just being there, for tempting him to cut the rope.

The absurdity of the second is meant to reflect the absurdity of the first.

 

It is not a girls fault for walking anywhere wearing anything at anytime.

 

If you cannot control yourself in a public place get off the street and get help.