peds

There was a funny rumour going around that JD and his friends in college, I think, either as a group or individually in private, but together... if you see what I mean? ... put a latex glove between two couch cushions and, err, simulated coitus with it to completion. And there doesn't seem to be much truth behind it, but then an article appeared in maybe the New York Times, somewhere towards the back, unseen, explaining why it was nonsense... and JD's team then demanded a retraction and apology for that article, making it look like they were taking issue with the idea that it never happened... suggesting to the whole wide world, therefore, that it did. So it was a non-story about some daft thing that may or may not have happened in the murky past of someone's younger years, and really, who gives a ****************... but it was then dealt with in the wrong way, and it grew legs, and is now working hard to sink Trump’s presidential campaign. A bit of a Streisand Effect sort of thing. Some of the details above may be misremembered, and I'd recommend you seek clarification from a stronger source if the story interests you, but like I said... who really gives a ****************?

Yeah, thanks for your opinion, and being a smelly hippy into peace and love and minimising the suffering of all living creatures, naturally I agree, in general. But being taken apart by a swarm of angry chickens is a damn sight quicker than any death that same rat could ever hope to find elsewhere in it's environment... play-torture at the sadistic claws of a cat, shitting it's guts out for three days from poison, chewing off a leg from a poor strike on a rat trap, dessicating on a sticky board... or, best case scenario, the rat reaching a ripe old age and simply starving to death when unable to forage their own food... I'll take the easy way out of being winged by a pellet and torn apart by birds, thanks. Anyway, that's a nice shotgun you've got there! I doubt that would leave much for a meal for the hens of poor wee Ratty. Chips and dips, maybe.

Absolutely clueless.

Interesting point about the kind of picture on display above... your type of people need to rely on AI generated images for your lolz, whereas us lot have a whole library of actual photographs from real-world events to draw on, created spontaneously by your clown show idols.

No, it's because you're a stark raving racist. Keep up!

Boooooooorrriiinnnngggggg Edit: Back to VP news... Man, he's going to make a great VP.

That looks like a great toy! Could be just the ticket, for reasons I'll explain in reply to Stubby below... So we've actually got a few things working in our favour here... first, they are brazen little fellas, and range isn't an issue, you could stand indoors at the kitchen window and they'll just stroll across the patio not 4 metres in front of you. Sit on the patio instead and they'll probably run across your shoes. It's why I'm considering an airgun at all, honestly, they are a slow moving target at close range, definitely an easy task. If you miss you could probably just swing the gun around and beat it to death with the butt stock. It really wouldn't be used at any range greater than that, except for plinking by visiting grandkids. It'd be used indoors too, the shed, the garage, the summer house. Secondly, getting a pellet right in the dome to ensure a quick kill might not be strictly necessary... as on one side of this patio is the hen run, where they get most of their diet! The hens, scary little dinosaurs that they are, like to hunt and eat the rats, they are hugely motivated for the extra protein. The chase can be a real skin-of-the-teeth affair at times, especially if the poor rat gets held up in the chicken wire fence... at the first sound of commotion, all the girls come running over to see what the story is. So a wounded rat from a poor shot is just as dead, after being ripped apart by half a dozen 12in tall velociraptors. I'll get some pictures when I'm back in the UK to illustrate the scene, I've brought my folks over to Ireland for a couple of weeks for a visit, so the rats are probably having a whale of a time at the moment.

I echo the above, and look forward to the days of slightly-less horrific photo updates. Hope all is well.

Most likely, love thy neighbour and all that, except for all the infidels. Edit: or is it heretics? Edit2: or is if pagans? I forget the correct terminology...

That's his second name!

He's the third leg in the cuckholdry arrangement that Dave likes to imagine me in. (Not entirely sure why he likes to think of me this way, but heck, I'm not the one who's life coach is a book written by a bronze age goatherder )

Leviticus is right about one thing... loads more people should be stoned. It'd make the whole place so much more peaceful, man.

My wife and Mbepe have given us two beautiful kids, so I definitely can't be gay... 🤔

When the time comes, comrade, there won't be enough lampposts for the bastards. We'll have to make 'em share!

Righto, no he's in the middle of England, no spoilsport Irish regulations to deal with! I guess that would make it a bit more of a hassle for me to take ownership of it when the inevitable arrives though, which I hadn't really considered... so thanks for that.

Nice one, I'll look into that. Cheers Stubby.

Yeah, they've got a few of those all right, and I got them a Goodnature 24, which I'm a big fan of. But I'm just looking at other avenues as well. Cheers though!

I Lol at Thai massage I wouldn't be opposed to suggesting an air rifle as opposed to an air pistol, as I'd inevitably be inheriting it at some point in the future and I imagine I'd get a lot more use out of it, rather than a pistol. I had great fun plinking with my grandad's air rifle when I was single digits, and I wouldn't mind owning one again.

What do you mean by a garden gun, boss? Keeping in mind a lack of certification for the individual concerned, and given his current health, not many years left to obtain and enjoy one... I'd say cats are probably the way forward, or maybe even ferrets!

Oh no! I'm being taunted by a simpleton! I'll have difficulty getting to sleep tonight! Here you go buddy, that's at about your level: https://climatekids.nasa.gov/kids-guide-to-climate-change/

Simple, you stick a cork in 'em and charge people for hot air balloon rides. Win-win.

Fair enough, thanks for the advice chaps. I might just get them a pair of cats again instead, the rodent problem has been on the rise since their last brother and sister cats died a few years ago. Maybe a little crossbow? Shuriken? Throwing axe?