Logs - what do they want ???

[Dean Lofthouse]

Someone approached me last week wanting logs. This chap is a multi millionaire and uses these logs for traditional baking in one of his buisness's.

 

He asked me if I would sell him some.

 

I told him I wanted £50 for a bulk bag of 3 year seasoned split logs. He nearly fell over backwards.

 

What about a load?

 

That is equivelant to a full load so the same price I said.

 

Will you do me a Transit load for £100?

 

No way I said, that's even bigger than my landy!

I'll go to £120 a load but only because you are wanting bigger logs so there's not as much splitting.

 

I said look, you are talking about hardwoods seasoned for a long time with a guaranteed moisture content. You can get cheap logs from any tree surgeon who will drop you a load off wet through, I can do that. But there's no way I'm selling my seasoned hardwood logs that's been under cover for two years any cheaper.

 

I'll tell you what I said, I'll do you a load of split logs for £100 but it will be from that pile over there, it's been out in the rain, it,s all mainly crap, big lumps of pop and conifer, most of the rings have been flat to soil so will be wet.

 

Ok he said.

 

Just delivered them to him this morning. Tipped them out and after picking a couple up he said, " these are wet"

 

I know they are I said with a grin on my face.

 

If you want dry, I can do dry, but you will only pay for wet, so you get wet you knew that.

 

Tut Tut, Some people

[Rupe]

Did he pay you?

 

If not drop him another load but don't bother splitting them!

[Dean Lofthouse]

Did he pay you?

 

 

Yes by cheque

 

Next time I'm adding 20% for cheques

[Rupe]

17.5 % at least, surely?

[Dean Lofthouse]

17.5 % at least, surely?

 

Plus 2.5% handling fee

[Rupe]

Yeah, good idea. He'd be back to 120 quid and still have wet logs, ha!

[Justme]

17.5 % at least, surely?

 

Why? Vat on fuel is only 5%

 

Justme

[Mac McLennan]

Why? Vat on fuel is only 5%

 

Justme

 

It's called being a tw4t tax:sneaky2: I often use it...

[Rupe]

Why? Vat on fuel is only 5%

 

Justme

 

He's unlikely to know that!

 

Actually my accountant told me to charge 17.5% VAT for logs? I thought it was less, not necessarily 5% but certainly less than 17.5.

 

I rarely need to add the vat on though

[Dean Lofthouse]

Why? Vat on fuel is only 5%

 

Justme

 

Income tax is 20%